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| Thread: My 30 minutes of adulthood | |
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2XtremeToTake
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted July 18, 2005 07:11 PM |
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My 30 minutes of adulthood
This is a very personal story that has happened to me the other day, and after some careful contemplation, I have decided most people in these forums are mature enough to understand it.
Alot of you are adults, but when you were kids, was there ever a single moment that tested your fortitude? A situation that required YOU and only YOU to take control of a potentially explosive situation? Sort of a test for your adulthood?
I live with my father, grandmother, stepmother, stepbrother, and two little brothers. My father used to have a drinking problem, and still does every now and then. Alot of it has to do with his days back in Desert Storm, and the fact that my mother died at the young age of 39.
Well the other day, my father decided to bring up the old times, and he got wasted. Now my father is usually a very good guy to get along with when sober. But when he gets drunk, he turns into everybodys worst nightmare, very violent.
After quite a bit of arguing, him and my stepmother get into it. He starts choking her. I run and tackle him down to the bed. My stepbrother took a more careful approach, and began whacking away with a baseball bat at his legs. I realized I was holding my own father down while he was being beaten down with a baseball bat. I quickly let go and snatched the bat out of my stepbrothers hand and threw it on the other side of the room, telling him If he's gonna fight, fight fair and like a man.
Well, while I'm telling him this, My father makes a lunge for my stepmother again, but she grabs the bat and hits him several times, causing me to snatch it out of her hands. My youngest brother comes in and is litterally restraining her, holding her back. A big arguement ensues, with much provoking and name calling. My stepmother makes a lunge for my father, she picks up a pipe and rears back to hit him, and knocks me in the mouth in the process. My lip is now bleedly freely. I manage to wrench the pipe out of her hands, and my brother restrains her. Everyone begins yelling and making threats.
Well my drunken father reaches over to call the police. He's already been to jail twice over the same snow in the last 5 years, and i would be DAMNED if he was going again. I ripped the phone cord out of the wall and threw it. This is where i took control. I took the baseball bat and looked around at all parties. My adrenaline got the best of me, and I can't really remember what happened here, i said something along the lines of
"WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE! BEATING EACH OTHER LIKE WILD ANIMALS! WHAT THE ****!!"
This caught their attention. I suddenly realized what i was doing. There were 2 adults in here, and I'm sitting here telling them what to do. My stepbrother has left the scene and went to a friends house. I claimed control of the house, and began ORDERING two 40+ year old adults around. This is where i began to wonder, "Is this just a test of my leadership skills?"
I told my two younger brothers to litterally drag my stepmother out of their room, which they did. THen it was just me and my father. I confronted him, not as his son, not as a boy, but as a man. I told him if hes gonna harm anyone else, he is going to have to go through me. I didnt yell at him, i told him in the calmest voice possible. I told him he had two choices, he is going to lie down and go to sleep and sober up, or someone is going to end up in Jail or the Hospital. After a bit of talking, he decided to sleep.
Then i had my stepmother to deal with. Apparently, my brothers let her go and she had attempted to commit suicide by popping a handful of mixed prescription pills. She has no record of being suicidal, so i was caught off guard. She claimed she didnt, but I didnt trust her. I called 911 immediatly. I walked to the back room and caught her ready to pop another handful of pills into her mouth. I charged at her, and gave her a tackle harder than I give most guys on the opposing football team. Luckily, she landed on her bed. I restrained her until the paramedics arrived. They did some checked her blood or something like that, and the pills were harmless. I ordered her to bed as well after they left.
I then sat up the entire night thinking "What in the ****?"
Now my question to you guys is, was everything i did justified?
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I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted July 18, 2005 07:47 PM |
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i think you handled it with the best of your ability with what you were handed...
when you tackled your father, you didn't start to beat on him... and when you realized that your brother (step brother?) was hitting him with a bat you addressed that situation as well...
I think your concept of fairness was apparent in your explanation... instead of making things worse I think you tried your best to diffuse the situation.
I think tackling your step mother was a little rough.
but having not been there, I can only assume you reacted in the way you felt appropriate for the moment.
I've never really faced a case of domestic violence so it is very difficult to play jury. You seem to have tried to minimize the damage to each family member.
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"You went over my helmet??"
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Wiseman
Known Hero
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posted July 18, 2005 08:44 PM |
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I thought the topic is about sex.
Oh, well I guess violence is the next best thing.
BTW, yes everything you did was justified, although
I personally think a bit less of the F-word and a bit more of prodding buttock is in order the next time.
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Truth may be out there, but lies are inside your head.
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pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
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posted July 18, 2005 09:26 PM |
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It sounds like you handled yourself very well - I'm sorry that you find yourself in a situation where you have to do that. 
Have you considered getting yourself and your brothers into a support group for teens with alcoholic parents? They can really help you to deal with what you're having to live with - its not a burden a teen should be having to take on alone.
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"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
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2XtremeToTake
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted July 19, 2005 02:02 AM |
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Pandora, like i said - this don't happen often. And I hate all forms of counseling, its just one of my pet peeves.
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I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
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posted July 19, 2005 02:21 AM |
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Thats fair, to be honest I'm not a fan of counselling either - but thats another topic.
I wasn't referring to one on one type therapy, I just thought that others might have possible solutions for you in handling things.
I'm really glad to hear that it doesn't happen often 
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"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
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Valeriy
Mage of the Land
Naughty, Naughty Valeriy
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posted July 19, 2005 03:06 AM |
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2X, I think you're the man the way you handled this situation. It's easy to talk about all the proper values and right things to do, but when faced with an angry and violent situation and no time to think, it's very different, true nature comes out. And I think the way you took charge of the situation was doing the best for everyone without hate and without fear. Sometimes violent people have to be restrained by forceful means when they don't listen and want to harm others.
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You can wait for others to do it, but if they don't know how, you'll wait forever.
Be an example of what you want to see on HC and in the world.
http://www.heroesofmightandmagic.com
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Shiva
Promising
Famous Hero
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posted July 19, 2005 11:42 AM |
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I can't say I've ever been in a situation like that.
You acted as well as you could considering the
circumstances. Seems to me your 30 minutes are more
like 24/7
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MysticEyes
Adventuring Hero
Take care: you'll be blind!
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posted July 27, 2005 03:17 PM |
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2x I think you had to do what It had to be done to avoid worst consequences!
You're lucky to have enough strength to resist in this situation! (you remained yourself enough to make quick decisions)
I hope not to have it too! (never!)
Good luck!
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Knowledge is nothing without wisdom!
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