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| Thread: the whole truth about TDL (sorry in advance) | |
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TDL
Honorable
Supreme Hero
The weak suffer. I endure.
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posted December 16, 2005 07:26 PM |
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the whole truth about TDL (sorry in advance)
There are various reasons that force me to write this post. First being that I cannot hold on to the lies that follow me everywhere anymore. I cannot keep this secret as sooner or later it was to be found out anyway. It is very difficult for me to post this as this may be my suicide and you would probably never see me anymore, but I cannot keep the truth from being told. For this post, as I said, I may be penalized, silenced or banned (I have made a great many mistakes, but no one actually knows what mistakes), I could become disgraceful or bad-mannered or maybe you would simply ignore me in future, but I simply cannot lie to you as with time you are truly becoming my friends.
You may be thinking I am talking blabberish (all kinds of nonsense) and am just complaining to attract your attention, but you are all wrong. I am not a mean person and what I did was mainly because much time has passed and I have changed.
So as not to annoy and bore you, I finally let go off the truth:
TDL is the true remains of regnus_khan, once a known member throughout the board. Now, I ask you, as you have read the following, not to judge me for my actions in advance. I want you to read what I am for the first time in my whole membership writing from my heart and telling you the truth.
I say "SORRY!" to all of you who I have fooled and lied to. You may or may not accept my apology. I know many members think me to be not who they once knew (as they did know about me), but I was truly known.
I am also very sorry for that I have created three accounts overall. The second account with the name of Talek was a joke (although it was both not funny for me and you and even damaged the board a bit) made by my friends and me being stupid. I know it was the gravest mistake of them all as it seems to be irrepairable. If you asked me what why did I create a new account, did not remain with my old one, I would answer that was because much time has passed. And indeed, much time has passed since I last visited the community. This was the main cause of my returning as TDL, That Darn Liar. It was hard for me to reappear on the board after making so many mistakes with my old account. I was young, naive, I only thought about myself (as I was obsessed with that ugly mania of "begging" for quality points by posting rubbish, same not interesting things or just copying somebody else's stuff) and never about the whole community (and that is why I joined the community now - I want to help the community). I did many mistakes of which I am certainly not fond of. I do not know what happened when I was not here and it is hard for me to catch up and distinguish what is what. That is why I act like a newbie and will supposedly act in future provided I am not banned or silenced.
I am truly sorry for that (and for repeating this - for me it is an expression of politeness) and for that there were many threads where I posted what was not exactly true.
However, for one, I can exactly tell that I feel as if I am a new member of this community. I had not visited this forum for more than half a year, I was known to have been partly as a spammer, partly as an imaginative. Sometimes I posted some posts just in order to look cool in everybody's eyes, to be someone who I am not.
If you asked me what TDL truly means and how it come to my mind, I would say that it was even before I actually created the regnus_khan account. TDL does not mean "that darn liar", although it is quite possible to have it understood that way. TDL does not mean anything - it is not an abbreviation. It only symbolises the balance - the picture I drew when I was small was a symmetrical figure that looked like scales. Friends offered called me the "pacifier", the "peacekeeper" as I was a calm and peaceful kid when I was young. However, now it seems to wreak havoc and unbalance the things, instead of doing otherwise 
Many mistakes were made. Many misunderstandings appeared. Therefore, I hereby want to apologize some members who must have felt really fooled or must have been offended by my behaviour when they read the upper part of the post.
to A_rebirthing_flight ( aka Lord_Pc ) :
Sorry, man. I knew I could count on you that you won't tell the truth to anyone at least until april fools, but I could not bear the fact that I am a liar anymore. I simply could not, whatever happens...
to Lich_King :
I know you may become angry now as I did not say I was not a newbie back then, when I added the threads to the table of contents. I hope you will not - I understand what is what and that you may think like many others that I am after the red stars, although it is not.
to Lord_Woock :
Oh man... you understood that in the end, although I contacted you through the messenger all the way long (I was off for a month as my computer was "ill" and never told you about myself. Thanks for that you wished well for me (I am not playing with my luck - things are being sorted out) by keeping the secret, but as I said before, the truth must be revealed.
to Pandora :
I do not seem to have much in common with you and I even think you do not know me at all - I wasn't a big of a fuss when you flourished and became a moderator and I do not actually remember if you saw me being here at all. Still, I owe you an apology too - I read your thread about the fake identities and how you seem to misunderstand and not like people who do so. I did the same - I created more accounts than I should have, so I deserve a spot in the blacklist. I remembered your words when I decided to join the community with the TDL username and it was not that good not to heed them. I just hope I am not one of those people...
to ShadowCaster:
I did not have much in common with you back then, but when I registered now, I understood of what quality the forum was and how I wanted to participate in things like these. I wrote to be a new quill. It may not seem so, but I am. I never actually participated in RPs before and my lousy attempts to make a RP myself were immediately turned down.
to ThE_HyDrA :
I truly owe you an apology. I know you thought me to be only a newbie, however, known to those who occasionally visited Altar of Wishes. I know that these things with Tables and help might seem awkward now and so-to-say unreal, created only for myself. However, I did not create it for myself - I have enough to do in my real life even without the list. But I think constant updates are vital, as many new and old things are scattered throughout both the Axeoth and the Altar forums and more and more newbies appear on the board - they surely need help and, what's more, interesting and quality threads for them to read.
to Valeriy :
Well, I should beg for mercy now, so as not get penalized or banned from the community because of doing so. However, I will not beg you for anything - I think I might look a bit over-confident now, but still... I will just simply let you and the other moderators and members decide my fate (as I do not have any other choice...). Maybe I am doing it all wrong, messing things up, "suiciding"... Maybe it is better to keep this secret... Maybe I will not be seen here anymore... But the truth must be told, whatsoever.
to everybody else who I know and knew regnus :
I do remember some of you, not a great many however. Memories seem to have been wiped out. I hope you all will understand me and will not judge my actions in advance. I am sorry if I caused someone to feel bad or if I affected the community in a kind of a bad way.
Now the truth is revealed... No more lies... No more lies... I may have repeated something or written what was not necessary, I was nervous and agitate when I wrote the message.
*a deep sigh*
I will now wait for you to "finish forging" my fate... I hope you reach a reasonable decision 
Sincerely yours, (for the first time in the last few years!)
TDL (aka regnus_khan)
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pandora
Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
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posted December 16, 2005 09:51 PM |
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Thank you for being open and honest about your usernames. The reason that I hate them so much, is that I find them completely unneccessary - I believe people should be themselves whether it is on or offline. Also, for the most part, people create them as a joke, just a bit of silliness to amuse themselves and waste space, as well as moderator's time... In your case, regardless of whether I feel it was neccessary or not, you had your own reasons for making them.
In this situation, I will ask that you simply post with only one name from here on - if you create another account without prior permission from Valeriy it will be silenced and you will not be permitted to post.
I don't have any bad feeling towards you because of this, and in your massive QP hunt you have come up with some great threads over the years, and I hope it continues (the good posts, not the shameless QP hunting  )
Again, thanks for being honest 
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"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
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