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| Thread: For the revheads out there | |
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted January 13, 2007 06:31 AM |
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For the revheads out there
Telltale signs that you’re a hoon
- You think the primary purpose of wings is to PREVENT flight.
- You feel compelled on a road trip to beat your previous best time.
- You are happiest when your street machine’s tyres are worn to racing depth and the wear bars are showing.
- When something falls off of your car, you wonder how much weight you just saved.
- When you hear ‘overcooked it’, instead of food you think of ‘off the track’.
- You change engine oil every other week.
- You sometimes hear little noises from your passengers when you get on the throttle right after turning in.
- You thoroughly enjoy showing the tailgater behind how to drive around a highway off-ramp.
- Your email address refers to your racecar rather than to you.
- You walk racing lines through the supermarket.
- You’ve paid $7.50 a litre for race fuel without complaining.
- You buy new parts because you don’t know where to put the spares.
- You bought a racecar before buying a house.
- You bought a racecar before buying furniture for the new house.
- You’re looking for a tow vehicle and still haven’t bought furniture!
- You find that you need a new house because you’ve outgrown your garage and the neighbours are threatening violence if you park one more vehicle on the street on in the front yard.
- You measure all family acquisitions in terms of the number of car parts that could have been purchased instead.
- You sit in your racecar in a dark garage and make car noises and shift and practice your heel and toe, while waiting for your engine to come back from the machine shop.
- You look at the purchase of tools as a long-term investment.
- You have enough spare parts to build another car.
- More than one speed shop recognises your voice and greets you by name when you call.
- You have car parts in your cubicle at work.
- Your Christmas list begins with another set of Mickey Thompsons and Carillo rods and your ‘significant other’ knows what they are.
- After your answer to “What did you do this weekend?” the next question is always “And you do this for fun, right?”
- You have a separate drawer for ‘garage clothes’.
- You remember the dates and details of every race you’ve ever been in, but can’t remember your own phone number.
- You complain when cars in front of you on highway off-ramps don’t stay on the line, causing your exit speed to drop.
- A neighbour asks if they have any oil, to which you query, “Synthetic or mineral?” and they reply, “Vegetable or corn”.
- You refer to the corner down the street from your house as ‘Turn One’.
- You look at the fire hydrant on that corner and see an apex marker.
- You enjoy driving in the rain on the way to work or school.
- You always cut the apex late at intersections and try to pass a few cars coming out.
- You always heel and toe on the downshifts just before your driveway.
- You can’t stand understeer but oversteer always makes you grin.
- You always want to change something in your street machine to make it handle better and go harder.
- You think that traction control and ABS are for people who can’t drive.
- You’ve even tried to convince your other half that you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her Hyundai.
- You save broken car parts as mementos.
- You’ve found your lawnmower runs sweetly on 110-octane fuel (but doesn’t particularly care for alcohol).
- The local tyre shop will not honour the tread life warranty on any car you have been within 50 metres of.
- The local police have a picture of your car taped to their dashboard.
- Instead of pictures in your wallet, you have time slips.
- Your idea of a good time is sitting around working out gear ratios and the ideal final drive ratio for given situations.
- You have speed shops programmed into your speed dialler.
- You own five cars and only one of them is street legal.
- You know the racing line of every turn in your daily commute, including your alternate routes, and practice hitting them every day.
- You quote your tyre wear in weeks rather than kilometres.
- You regularly live test your rev limiter on the straight that’s a little too long for 2nd but not worth going into 3rd for.
- You’ve started looking for sponsors for your daily drive car.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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Binabik
Responsible
Legendary Hero
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posted January 14, 2007 11:22 AM |
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In the states the term "gearhead" is sometimes used. It usually means someone into building race cars, but it can mean anyone who's into working on cars.
I have to admit some of those things on the list apply to me. Or at least they used to since I don't work on cars much any more. I also admit that my mechanic tools are one of my prized possessions.
In my opinion, I think everyone should know how to rebuild an engine and build a house to get a HS diploma. (yes, I'm completely serious)
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Binabik
Responsible
Legendary Hero
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posted January 14, 2007 12:17 PM |
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<<<You feel compelled on a road trip to beat your previous best time.>>>
Of course.
<<<You bought a racecar before buying a house.>>>
Define race car!
<<<You bought a racecar before buying furniture for the new house.>>>
Define furniture. Is a bucket seat funiture?
<<<You find that you need a new house because you’ve outgrown your garage and the neighbours are threatening violence if you park one more vehicle on the street on in the front yard.>>>
Never needed a new house, but I admit to owning 5-6 cars at one time.....and most of them even ran.
<<<You look at the purchase of tools as a long-term investment.>>>
Good tools should last a lifetime and pay for themselves many times over. So yea, they're a long term investment.
<<<More than one speed shop recognises your voice and greets you by name when you call.>>>
That doesn't take much effort.
<<<You have a separate drawer for ‘garage clothes’.>>>
You gotta be kidding, there's no way they'll all fit in one drawer! Besides there are at least three levels of garage clothes: normal work-on-the-car clothes, the really grubby clothes for laying in a puddle of transmission fluid, and the most important of all -- the ones that have graduated to grease rags.
<<<A neighbour asks if they have any oil, to which you query, “Synthetic or mineral?” and they reply, “Vegetable or corn”.>>>
Um, I would assume engine oil unless they specifically said vegetable oil (which I would have).
<<<You can’t stand understeer but oversteer always makes you grin.
>>>>
<<<You’ve even tried to convince your other half that you needed that flow bench to fix the air filter on her Hyundai.>>>
Well, my last girlfriend knows how to swap an engine, so I don't think she would fall for it....but it's always worth a try.
<<<You save broken car parts as mementos.>>>
If it was a good car, yea!
<<<Your idea of a good time is sitting around working out gear ratios and the ideal final drive ratio for given situations.>>>
Yea, so? (Sounds a lot like what I post in the HC Library.)
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