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| Thread: The 2L Joke Thread |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 · NEXT» |
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Herry
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
100% Devil
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posted December 15, 2016 08:04 PM |
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The 2L Joke Thread
So I decided to make a joke thread since there is not one lying around at the moment. I didn't post in the Tell a Joke thread since this is a bit different. The joke must strictly be a 2-liner. You put the first line in the title of the post(I can't here since this is the post that started the thread) and the punchline as the post itself.
I'll start:
I like women like I like my coffee.
Hot and all over my crotch when I'm driving
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Salamandre
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
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posted December 15, 2016 08:08 PM |
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How do you seduce a fat woman?
Piece of cake.
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phe
Famous Hero
Life and Freedom
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posted December 15, 2016 08:11 PM |
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Edited by phe at 20:13, 15 Dec 2016.
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Herry
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
100% Devil
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posted December 15, 2016 08:18 PM |
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After I changed sex, my daughter has been ignoring me
Seems like I'm transparent now.
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fred79
Disgraceful
Undefeatable Hero
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posted December 15, 2016 09:25 PM |
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Edited by fred79 at 21:27, 15 Dec 2016.
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beekeeper: i like my women like i like my coffee...
...covered in bees!
(ok, so i stole that line from eddie izzard. blow me)
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Salamandre
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
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posted December 19, 2016 08:43 PM |
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Female reaction to sexual advancement: "You're kidding right? Get the snow away from me!"
Male reaction: "You're kidding right? Please tell me you're not kidding!"
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Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
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posted December 19, 2016 09:14 PM |
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Edited by Celfious at 21:14, 19 Dec 2016.
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why do kangaroos hate the rain?
Because the kids have to play inside
bahahahaaaa
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What are you up to
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Herry
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
100% Devil
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posted December 20, 2016 07:44 PM |
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I was at an atm and this old lady asked me to help check her balance.
...So I pushed her over 
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fred79
Disgraceful
Undefeatable Hero
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posted December 20, 2016 11:04 PM |
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here's a couple mildly offensive/dark ones i found on some of the nastier parts of the internet, that i thought were damn hilarious(but still not too bad to post):
what's the difference between a taliban training site, and an afghani orphanage?
i don't know, man, i just fly the drone.
=======================
what did the jewish child abducter say to the children?
want to buy some candy?
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PandaTar
Responsible
Legendary Hero
Celestial Heavens Mascot
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posted December 20, 2016 11:22 PM |
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The guy was so ugly ...
... his mother only wanted to be his friend.
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"Okay. Look. We both said a lot of things that you're going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."
GlaDOS – Portal 2
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Celfious
Promising
Legendary Hero
From earth
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posted December 21, 2016 12:53 AM |
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Edited by Celfious at 00:54, 21 Dec 2016.
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how many Vietnam veterans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
YOU DON'T KNOW MAN... YOU WEREN'T THERE!!!
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What are you up to
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markmasters
Famous Hero
Dragon of justice
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posted December 21, 2016 11:20 AM |
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Why are women horrible at skiing?
Well, have you ever seen snow in the kitchen?
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PandaTar
Responsible
Legendary Hero
Celestial Heavens Mascot
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posted December 21, 2016 11:53 AM |
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The baby was so ugly...
... that his mother threw him away to raise the placenta instead.
*****
The baby was so ugly...
...that the doctor slapped his mother in the face.
*****
The colleen was so ugly...
...that when she passes by, all workers go back to work.
*****
You are so ugly...
...that when a cat sees you, it tries to bury you.
*****
The baby was so ugly...
...that the baptism became an exorcism.
*****
The guy was so ugly...
...that mirrors show a blue screen instead of his reflection.
*****
You are so ugly...
that Freddy Krueger has nightmares about you.
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"Okay. Look. We both said a lot of things that you're going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."
GlaDOS – Portal 2
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Herry
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
100% Devil
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posted December 21, 2016 01:34 PM |
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When you concentrate juice, nobody really cares...
But when you concentrate Jews, you're suddenly Hitler.
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fred79
Disgraceful
Undefeatable Hero
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posted December 21, 2016 03:22 PM |
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this thread has a lot of win in it. geny needs to get in here and post some jokes; because we've got two jew jokes so far, and no christian, catholic, or muslim. also, we need a female to make a joke about males. 
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markmasters
Famous Hero
Dragon of justice
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posted December 21, 2016 04:47 PM |
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Lol, keep em coming y'all  .
Why are asperines white?
Blacks never work.....
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PandaTar
Responsible
Legendary Hero
Celestial Heavens Mascot
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posted December 21, 2016 05:27 PM |
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Edited by PandaTar at 17:28, 21 Dec 2016.
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Your mommy is so fat...
...that when she attempted to jump, she got stuck in the air.
*****
The kid was so ugly...
...that his mother avoided getting him to the zoo, because she preferred people visiting him at home.
*****
The baby was so ugly...
...that it was the doctor the one who wailed and cried.
*****
You are so ugly...
...that you scare the scarecrow.
*****
You are so ugly...
...that even if you were two people, you would still be the ugliest one.
*****
You are so ugly...
...that when you stare too long into the abyss, it flees.
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"Okay. Look. We both said a lot of things that you're going to regret. But I think we can put our differences behind us. For science. You monster."
GlaDOS – Portal 2
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Herry
Bad-mannered
Famous Hero
100% Devil
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posted December 21, 2016 05:35 PM |
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((Panda please stop it with the redundancy))
Why are women and children evacuated first in a disaster?
So we can think about a solution in silence
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Geny
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted December 21, 2016 05:44 PM |
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fred79 said:
this thread has a lot of win in it. geny needs to get in here and post some jokes; because we've got two jew jokes so far, and no christian, catholic, or muslim.
Why? The worst Holocaust jokes I've heard originated in Israel.
Most two-liners I know are suited for HC anyway.
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DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.
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AlHazin
Promising
Supreme Hero
النور
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posted December 21, 2016 10:12 PM |
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fred79 said:
this thread has a lot of win in it. geny needs to get in here and post some jokes; because we've got two jew jokes so far, and no christian, catholic, or muslim. also, we need a female to make a joke about males.
Behind every great man is a woman,
What about having four then...
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Nothing of value disappears from this world, it will reappear in some shape or form ^^ - Elvin
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