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Thread: Don't tell the truth, tell the false truth, or nothing of the truth | This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 · «PREV / NEXT» |
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Lion_Leo
Tavern Dweller
The 6th Sense & 5th Element!
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posted March 15, 2005 08:03 AM |
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T-A, I thought I followed those guidelines when I responded to Khaelo's Post. I might have said that I was saying the opposite of what I meant, but essentially what I was saying was not the truth, the false truth, & nothing of the truth as well.
BEHOLD:
Oh yeah!...That was so good that I read it twice!
You obviously seem to have understood the whole meaning & purpose of this game Khaelo! Good on you!
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*The beginning to no end...
*Take care, Lion
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Conan
Responsible
Supreme Hero
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posted March 15, 2005 04:48 PM |
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*Confused*
Léo!!! What are you doing!! Telling the truth are you??? You said 2 opposing things, one has to be the truth yet you cannot do this!!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
*runs to his car, drives away....
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Lion_Leo
Tavern Dweller
The 6th Sense & 5th Element!
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posted March 15, 2005 05:40 PM |
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Quote: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!
*runs to his car, drives away....
I seem to have this effect on women...they always run away screaming...oh well!
Or am I just lying?!
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*The beginning to no end...
*Take care, Lion
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Vadskye91
Promising
Supreme Hero
Back again
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posted March 15, 2005 06:16 PM |
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*shivers* Now, you wouldn't make me do that, would you? I just got out of my therapy session!
I suppose there's no getting around it, though. It all started when I went on my annual vacation to Australia. (You wouldn't believe how hot it is!) I was a little bored with endless kangaroos, so I asked the guide if we could see something a little more interesting. Sure, kangaroos are nice- the first hundred times. So he agreed to take us to a different section of the outback, a little more off the beaten trail. Just as we were cresting a hill and getting up to speed, I leaned over the back to look at the grass flying away beneath us. Just at that moment, a bird divebombed me and knocked me out on the grass! When I awoke, I felt aches and scrapes and a burning all over my body. I figured I must had tumbled across the grass after I fell out, which accounted for the scrapes, and after that I had lain on the grass for who knows how long, and thus had been sunburned, which accounted for the burning. I tried to sit up, but found myself restrained by some kind of cords. I tried to open my eyes, but I was too tired... When I woke up again, I felt that my position had not changed. When I opened my eyes, I found myself tied to a tree by think vines. I was in the middle of a bunch of trees, and there was no one in sight. I tried to break loose of the vines, but to no avail. I was getting a little cold, too. Suddenly, without warning, the vines broke free. I heard sinister noises around me, so I sprang up and ran. Even though the trees made it impossible for me to tell where I was going, that didn't matter much to me; whatever made the noise was rapidly approaching. I could hear the unnerving sound of birds cawing unnaturally. I climbed a tree hastily to escape my unidentified puruer, but felt myself being dragged down again. I clawed at the bark as I fell, and grasped a tree branch in an attempt to slow my descent. It was to no avail, however, as even the tree branch broke under the incredible muscularity of my assailant. I fell to the ground, then stuggled futily to my feet. Standing before me was a great, dark, mass of fur and flesh. A pack of wolves, led by a massive wolf standing some four feet at the shoulders, was what had been following me. The leader began barking out what I assumed to be orders, and the pack circled me menacingly. I tried to run, but they were all around me. Then the first one charged. I tried to pick up a tree branch to defend myself, but the wolf was too quick and I only had time to dodge. He spun around, and as if on cue the rest of the pack charged with him. I picked up the tree branch and started randomly swinging it, but it was no use. They were all around me, and I felt myself being ripped away. Then, just as I was losing all sense of thought, I saw a bright light and knew that my time had come. I passed out, waking up in a hospital somewhere. When I asked what was going on, it came out that the bright light was actually the headlights of the jeep that had come looking for me. It took 287 stitches and 3 transfusions, but I came back and now it only hurts on Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Sundays. Eventually I should be able to walk again.
So, Silverblade, have you ever watched Teletubbies? Please, don't spare us the details!
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Knowledge is power...
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Silverblade
Known Hero
Notorious Homo Erectus
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posted March 15, 2005 09:23 PM |
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Quote: So, Silverblade, have you ever watched Teletubbies? Please, don't spare us the details!
Yeah! Teletubbies ! That's my favourite show! I watch it every day. It makes my day! Needless to say ,that here Teletubbies have a 24 hour broadcast, their own TV channel and their own Fun Club (No need to brag but I am the official Teletubbies Fun Club President...)
I just adore them! Aren't they cute? Little aliens with lovely baby faces, don't you want just to hug them? I don't know why some bad people HATE them.. I don't get why are they mean people who put Teletubbies into some weird videos and games that make them ...I can't find the words.. make them stuff..*snif*.. to each other ("The Teletubby Candy Shop" etc) and to other people ("Teletubbies' Haloween" etc). Furthermore those meanies say bad things about the stuff they have on their heads..Some even say that they are used as *sex toys*.. Those perverts..Shame on them..May they Burn in a Hell Pitt..Those Infidels..
To sum up I just looooove Teletubbies I don't dispise them I don't dispise them at all-anyone who says those things for me must be burned at the stake.. And I watch them fanatically I never lose them and if I do I record them so I can watch them again and again...
Next question goes to...
MightyMage..share with us an experience you had that includes your old and grumpy neighbour and his cow in very *private* moments...
@Edit: The question will go to the first taker if not answered until Thursday evening
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Back for Oblivion
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Svarog
Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
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posted March 16, 2005 12:55 AM |
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Edited By: Svarog on 15 Mar 2005
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Interpretation (leo's style)
BEHOLD:
(Dont look!)
Oh yeah!... (Oh no!) That was so good that I read it twice!
(That was so bad that I didnt read it even twice.)
You obviously seem to have understood the whole meaning & purpose of this game Khaelo! (You obviously didnt seem to have understood the whole meaning and purpose of this game, non-Khaelo!) Good on you! (Shame on you!)
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The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.
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Svarog
Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
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posted March 16, 2005 01:00 AM |
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Of course what I interpreted up there was the opposite of what I really meant.
Oh wait, this too...
Ah hell, thats what I call an unreliable thread!
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The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.
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Conan
Responsible
Supreme Hero
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posted March 16, 2005 02:54 AM |
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LOL wait.... SOB!
*I'm not lost... I understand this opposite-of-what-you-mean-thread...
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Your life as it has been is over. From this time forward, you will service.... us. - Star Trek TNG
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
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posted March 16, 2005 07:47 AM |
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Enough!
I'm going crazy! Please, keep your opposite or double opposite or reverse psychology to a minimum! The lying is intended only for the response to the questions!
You feeble minded foobums!
Or not feeble minded foobums
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John says to live above hell.
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tigris
Supreme Hero
Supreme Noobolator
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posted March 16, 2005 08:06 AM |
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*checked ur signature*
That's quite nice, though awfully quiet
4 members couldn't make a lot of noise lool "P
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MightyMage
Honorable
Legendary Hero
of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
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posted March 17, 2005 08:27 PM |
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Quote:
Next question goes to...
MightyMage..share with us an experience you had that includes your old and grumpy neighbour and his cow in very *private* moments...
Oh Jeez, I told myself I would never speak of that again. Well, since I feel a certain level of comitment I may as well. You see it all started on a normal morning...I think it was morning-wait, yeah it was morning. After throwing up last nights concoction of Bacardi and...somthing else I ventured into the kitchen to look for the asprin when I heard what sounded like some spawn of hell emerging. I looked through the window above the kitchen sink trying to see what the hell was making my head throb worse than it already was. All I saw for the moment was the boy down the street stealing his parents car again. Kids.
Now to better understand the situation I should explain the neighborhood. I live in what used to be a relativly nice area. A suburb of the infamous Detroit. Well as one knows, when a major city starts to get real crappy and real full, people begin to move. Directly next door to me is a woman with four kids who is never home. On the other side of my house is an empty rental house because the people living there skipped town in the middle of the night (true story, ask me about that later). Ahhh, but next to them is what makes every proud American cringe in torment. The redneck. The redneck has stood out in American culture due to their unusual behavior, beer intake, and love of all things Nascar. This particular redneck family took little time in destroying the property and killing every inch of grass that was their lawn. And like true rednecks they neither cared nor worried what others thought. For some odd reason though they insisted on growing some flowers...or at least trying. Tony, the head of the pack stood outside this morning, shirtless, cursing at the baren soil in front of him. Haley, the mother of the pack, emerged from the dwelling and offered her shotgun toting mate a beer. After screaming some obsenities and downing the can, Tony jumped into his truck and drove off somwhere. The youngest female (about 15 I believe), emerged from the dwelling as well with her child cursing at her mother for allowing the male unit to drive off in their only form of transportation. "But Janie", the mother replied "Your father had places to go. Now git back in the gawdamn house and feed that little basterd child of yers."
It wasn't long before Tony pulled up with a trailer attached to the truck and got out smiling at his acomplishment and drinking another beer (where do they pull these out of?).
He hurried to the back of the trailer and unlatched it. "Hey Maw", he screamed "Come on out here. I got sumthin ta show ya's."
Haley ran out cursing at him for waking the baby and screamed when he brought a cow walking out of the trailer. That's right, a cow. Why buy a bag of fertilizer and a gallon of milk when you get both in one package. Needless to say Tony loved the cow, very much.
At first I thought this was a side effect of the party from the night before. Perhaps I was seeing things...Oh god, I was not seeing that. I did not WANT to see that.
I ran out the front door yelling at the idiot, "what the hell are you doing?"
It was at that point I realized he was drunk and probably had been for the past week. He responded by introducing himself, as if I didn't know who he was.
"Hiiiii, my name is To Nee. Git it. Ha ha ha. Toe Knee. Ha ha. Toe knee. Ha ha ha."
"I know who you are. But what in God's name are you doing to that cow?"
At this point it dawned on me that whatever it was they were doing, it was going on in my front yard.
"I'm killin two birds with one stone so ta speak. I'm feedin it an milkin it. Sorry bout your lawn. After I sell my fertilizer and milk I'll cut you a check."
Riiiight. I guess in his drunken state he didn't realize that this was in fact a male cow and that he was not going to get any milk out of it. In normal circumstances I would have laughed but than the thing started fertilizing my lawn. How nice.
That night I could hear him whoopin and hollerin over somthing so I glanced out the window and sure enough there he was with that damned cow crapping on my lawn again. I waited up for awhile and after he went back into his house I came on out, walked over to his place, and took a crap on his front porch.
The next morning I awoke with anticipation to see what he would say. He opened the door and began to step out.
Here it comes I thought. As he put his foot down one of the local policemen was driving by which diverted his attention. He sliped on the pile and went flying in the direction of the cow. The police man stopped his car to watch what appeared to be the man having his weay with the cow. In actuality he was trying to move but his crap covered shoes kept slipping giving an unusual show that looked like a man...well you know.
The officer jumped out of his car and dashed to the scene. It was about that time I called animal control and told them the sad tale of my cow mollestor neighbor.
Needless to say the man was arrested and the cow was taken into custody by animal control who turned it over to Great Oaks Cattle house or somthing like that. Speaking of which, I think I have some ground round in my freezer and a burger sounds good right about now.
My question is @ Asmodean,
Dean, is it true? I want to know what really happened when England had that Tea drought. Did you really have anything to do with it what with you devil inspired Rock and Roll
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted March 20, 2005 07:13 AM |
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On Asmo's behalf
Satan influenced music altogether. Gregorian chanting was also Satanic.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Professional
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posted March 30, 2005 01:28 AM |
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Looks like Asmodeans not here...
So Lkru33, have you met anyone famous recently? We’ve all heard about that famous person in your house, tell us more!
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John says to live above hell.
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lkru33
Promising
Famous Hero
3x NFL Pick'em Champ
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posted April 01, 2005 03:54 PM |
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Edited By: lkru33 on 1 Apr 2005
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Quote: Looks like Asmodeans not here...
So Lkru33, have you met anyone famous recently? We’ve all heard about that famous person in your house, tell us more!
Well, I guess the secret is out and now spread throughout the entire HC community, so I can't hide this any longer. It all started when I fell asleep at my computer during a game of Heroes and woke up hours later only to find myself lying in a pile full of McBurgers!! I was stunned... but hungry, so I ate 2 tasty Big Mac's that were lying next to me and then got up and looked around my house to see what was going on. I heard a noise in the other room, so as I walked in the direction of the noise, out jumped this mysterious clown!! "Hey, looks like you could use something to wash that down with" this clown said to me as he handed me a McStrawberry shake. As I grabbed the shake I looked up at him and said... Holy McS*** , you are Ronald McDonald!!!! He smiled and said "you looked a little low on energy...thought you may need some food to give you the energy to finish that Heroes game". Then in the next second, he was gone. I thought to myself... nah, this can't be true... must be a dream. So I went back to bed, woke up this morning only to find that Ronald has also paid a visit to the McHeroes Community!!
Next: Leo... tell us about the time when a Heroes creature came to your door and took you as it's leader to go to battle.
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Leo_Lion
Honorable
Supreme Hero
The 5th Element & 6th Sense!
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posted April 06, 2005 06:34 AM |
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Quote: Next: Leo... tell us about the time when a Heroes creature came to your door and took you as it's leader to go to battle.
Sorry it took so long everybody, but here it finally is....
Oh man, do I ever have a story for you!
One Saturday afternoon, I was just lounging in front of my computer and Posting some jokes on HC, when my doorbell rang. It was the middle of the day, so I figured I would be facing a pathetic door-to-door vacuum cleaner salesman or some righteous Jehovah's Witnesses. So, as I opened the door with an impatient look on my face, I was surprised to see a gorgeous Pixie standing before me.
Although she was out of breath & panting, she managed to explain how she had flown to my home as fast as she could, in order to solicit my expert services for an important battle her race was involved in. At this point I got all giddy...not only because she wanted to solicit my expert services, but also because I was mesmerized by the heaving of her enormous chest.
As she noticed that I was undressing her with my eyes, she said that if I followed her, I would be surrounded by beauties such as herself. Having no blood left in my brain, I quickly accepted and let her grab my wrist & fly-off towards what I what thought would be a full-blown-s*e*x-sandwich (Where I am the meat and the pixies are the bread! )
En route, she described to me how a group of nasty Harpy Hags had ventured onto Pixie territory and were causing havoc amongst the population. The Pixies had attempted to drive the beasts off their lands, but without any real leadership to focus their collective might, they had failed time-after-time. She went on to say that this was why she had come to me and that if I were to lead the Pixies to victory, I would be able to get my hands on "mounds" of rewards.
Needless to say, I was ready for battle!
As my concern for the lives of the Pixies, as well as my own, was growing; my escort landed next to a large stadium-type building. I thought that she was just taking a break from all of the flying, but when she asked me to follow her inside, I assumed that we were perhaps going to meet with some of the troops and prepare a battle-plan.
As she led me down dimly lit tunnels, I could hear loud chanting and heavy stomping coming through the cement, from the middle of the structure. I couldn't make out any of the words, but the noise sounded very much like battle cries. My Pixie escort then pointed towards a large metal door and asked me to go inside. As I pushed my way in, my eyes took a few seconds adjusting to the bright lights. But when I could finally focus my sight, I was encircled by half-a-dozen exquisite Sprites. They were dressed in dark-coloured robes and all had flowing blonde hair that looked like silk and wore expressions of relief across their enchanting faces.
One of them approached me and quietly said: "We are just about to engage the dubious Harpy Hags in the final battle. We 6 Sprites, have been chosen from all Pixies in our domain to face off against our enemy. Considering that so much is at stake, we needed to bring you here, so that you could guide us to victory. Will you accept the noble role of our Leader?"
Being humbled by the striking beauty and allure of these 6 creatures, I did what any horny man would do…I accepted the challenge!
As the Sprites sang with joy, they ran out of the room
and headed up a lushly carpeted ramp. I followed closely behind them, not really knowing what was going to happen next. As the Sprites reached the top of the slowly rising ramp, the yelling & cheers, which had been a mumbled noise in the background, had now become a deafening roar!
Finally, as we all burst through a large curtain, my eyes had difficulty adjusting to the magnitude of what I saw. This stadium was filled to capacity with raging & screaming, yet magnificent, Pixies. And as my gaze moved to the center of the open area, I was perplexed to see what looked like a boxing ring.
But, as we made our way towards the center of the gathering, I noticed that instead of a nice white mat, this ring was mostly brown. So, as we continued to push our way through the Throng of Pixies, I was baffled to discover that this ring was not for the purpose of boxing, but for Mud-Wrestling. And at that very moment, my squad of Sprites threw off their gowns to reveal their true uniforms...string bikinis!
I couldn't believe my eyes! The Harpy Hags ,were on the opposite side of the ring and were also wearing skimpy bikinis that also exemplified their well-endowed chests. Then it dawned on me, this battle did not involve land, resources, or lives...it involved reputation, honour, respect, and the Erathian Mud-Wrestling Championship belt!
Needless to say, using the expertise that I had developed from watching hundreds of mud-wrestling matches at the local nudy-bar, I was able to lead my troops to victory! Then to my extreme surprise, not only was I rewarded by having some "quality time" with my Sweet & Sexy Sprites, but the Hardcore Harpy Hags decided to join in on the fun as well! +++My question is for Conan:
What did you ever do about those Underpants-gnomes that kept stealing you underwear?
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*The end to no beginning...
*Take care, Leo
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Conan
Responsible
Supreme Hero
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posted April 08, 2005 09:44 PM |
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Edited By: Conan on 8 Apr 2005
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you had to remind me...
Damn underpants gnomes. I was hoping you weren't going to bring it up. Well now that you ask, I guess I have to tell you the false truth, or nothing of the truth!
I guess I had to do something about those underpants gnomes since everyday after my morning shower, I'd have to wear the same underpants every day cause they kept on stealing mine.
I never understood their fascination with my underpants, but one day I was able to catch one in the act and question him in exchange for his freedom. He told me it was a fetish of theirs to wear them on their heads while doing the boogy-woogy As soon as their secret was out though, they came to get him and they never let him go after that...
Anyways, know that I knew the purpose of their scheme, I was able to take action since my current underpants were starting to stench.
This is what I did: I bought a cheap pair of underpants and put some glue inside of them. That way when they would put them on their heads, they would never be able to take them off! HAHA! I was on top of my game that day. So there I was, putting some glue inside my underpants and placing them neatly in my drawer. The next morning I wake up to find that the underwear was missing and thought to myself the plan had worked. I wainted a couple days and bought some new underpants.
They never came after them after that and I guess I won the war. Poor gnome must of had to take his pointy hat off to unstick the underpants from it. Must of taken hours.
Ah well, all is good now.
Next question to LKru33:
explain to us what happened the last time you swam in a swimming pool
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Your life as it has been is over. From this time forward, you will service.... us. - Star Trek TNG
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lkru33
Promising
Famous Hero
3x NFL Pick'em Champ
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posted April 13, 2005 05:44 PM |
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Edited By: lkru33 on 13 Apr 2005
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Quote:
Next question to LKru33:
explain to us what happened the last time you swam in a swimming pool
The last time I swam in a swimming pool, I was drunk at a party and decided it would be fun to go pool hopping. I climbed a big privacy fence, worked my way through the thick woods and found a nice in ground pool with a diving board. Since it was a hot summer night and I was plastered, I decided it was an excellent time to strip down and hop in for a swim. It had appeared that nobody was home, but then I heard some noises. It appeared that the local cheerleading camp had the same idea as me Without noticing me, they stripped down and dove in, only to be shocked by my presence. At first, they were apologetic because they thought I lived there... but after I told them everything was cool, I was doing the same thing... they carried on. Last I remember, I was being molested by the town cheerleading squad.
Next Question: To Pandora - Tell us about your unusual shower experience
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Lion_Leo
Tavern Dweller
The 6th Sense & 5th Element!
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posted April 13, 2005 06:11 PM |
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Damn LKru, I hate the way that story ended! It was a completely predictable & boring ending that had me struggling just to finish it.
And don't even get me started on your question to Pandora...Conservative! Try to spice things up a little next time, geez...
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This Post did not Tell the Truth, it contained Nothing of the Truth, and was completely the False Truth!
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*The beginning to no end...
*Take care, Lion
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Conan
Responsible
Supreme Hero
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posted April 13, 2005 06:46 PM |
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Quote: This Post did not Tell the Truth, it contained Nothing of the Truth, and was completely the False Truth!
So if you meant the opposite of this, it was actually a really mean thing to say!
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Your life as it has been is over. From this time forward, you will service.... us. - Star Trek TNG
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lkru33
Promising
Famous Hero
3x NFL Pick'em Champ
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posted April 13, 2005 06:59 PM |
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Quote:
Quote: This Post did not Tell the Truth, it contained Nothing of the Truth, and was completely the False Truth!
So if you meant the opposite of this, it was actually a really mean thing to say!
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