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| Thread: What does an online community mean to Jebus? | |
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted September 16, 2005 06:02 AM |
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What does an online community mean to Jebus?
a drunken rant
What is it to be in a world where you get to know people for who they are? who they are... what does that mean?
What does it mean to know someone due to his words? I mean in the most literal sense, due to his words? Where can you get to know, to like, or to dislike, someone on the sole basis of way of expression, his way to argue, his way to joke? Where can someone, lonely, social, happy or sad, get to know an entire group of people for who they really are?
Have you ever been in a situation where you can judge someone for his opinion, his demeanor, his experiences, without ever beeing stabbed with the first time biais based on someone's physical attributes?
... I have.
... and it's right here.
I don't judge you all for the basic esthetic prejudice that I would normaly have to deal with in a real social setting... This is our only "true" test of a person's worth... a person's value. let me compare...
Im at a party, let's call it HC's annual bash. (if we're all lucky it's beeing held at Angel's Cuba resort)
Im looking around, I see some fat, skinny, 4 eyed, brace faced, coloured, albino, redneck, posh, white trash, gay, lesbian, by, hetero, gap, giant tiger, educated, lower class, clavin klein, anorexic(?), alcoholic, drugy , hippy, turban wearing, illeterate, blond, snowy, conservative, joe-jane's sitting/standing around chatting about the most trivial garbage that you can imagine in a social setting where most are more affraid to "look cool" than open up and let the world see them for who they are.
I will never get to know each and every one of those party goes for who they really are... why? because Im prejudice, Im biais, Im sexist, im relegious or im atheist. and frankly, none of these HC party goers suit me.
So I log on to a community where I can get to know the sarcastic, the humourous, the logical, the quick witted, the passionate, the diplomatic, the funny, the serious, the reserved, the outgoing, the quiet, the emmotional, the diplomatic, the civil, the **** disturber, the careless, the controlling, the manipulators, the drama queens, the attention seekers, the happy, the joyfull, the relaxed, the chill, the spammers, the political....
... for who they really are.
I've learned to like, love, resent, detest, despise, to appreciate, to joke with, to chat with, to respect, to be irritated by, to be annoyed by, to luck up to, to learn from, and see through, all of you..... why?
Because it's all you've got... this is all we've got. Our words. our posts.... my arguements and my opinions. wether they be accepting or descriminating, I have the priviledge to see right through you all. For some, this has helped me appreciate your qualities and for others, it has allowed me to see you for who you are.
You can lie to me or to us. You can deceive, manipulate and betray, just like you can be honnest, open up, be vulnerable.
... do I care....do you care?
you get to see me for who I am. I can see you for who you are. what I portray is what I allow to come through...
you can see me and decide what I mean to you, mean to this community. I can respect you like you can belittle me.
but in the end... everyone here will get to know each other member for who they really are. Sometimes it may take longer to get deep inside, but you can't hide, you can't lie, I can't betray, I can't deceive.
What does online communities mean to me??
... it means truth. Truth of self, and the oppertunity to be truthful to others. Why do we come here? To have the oppertunity to be real. To learn from others and take those lessons and apply them where they are the most important..... in the real world.
J
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"You went over my helmet??"
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2XtremeToTake
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted September 16, 2005 06:07 AM |
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*wipes tear from eye*
Excellent post Jebus, I didn't you you had intellectual capabilities 
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I almost had a psychic girlfriend but she left me before we met.
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bjorn190
Responsible
Supreme Hero
Jebus maker
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posted September 16, 2005 02:39 PM |
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The "real world" is full of obstacles and barriers that keep us from being our true selves. Mortality, the need to eat and other physical needs, the scarcity of resources, the finality of time and things that cannot be undone. All this imprisons who we once were.. who we could be.
Online we can be free. We can escape the shackles of everyday life with all its duties, and be our true selves for a while. And meet others in a way that would not be possible in the offline world. Without fear, regret, sorrow. Just one true self being close to another. That's why I like online.
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted September 21, 2005 06:36 PM |
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I moved this over (hopefully Rage will agree) because I felt it went hand in hand with the tread topic.
RAGE said (in "ok, that's it"):
Quote:
Ahh yes... people who can relate...
I can say there isn't many better things than when you feel a certain way and people can relate to how you feel, you know?
It kind of takes a load off you to know others see eye to eye with you.
Anyways, you guys are the kind of people I would associate with in real life I think... having opinions and not afraid to show how you feel...
Another person that probably belongs on this thread would be Consis... he appears to be a pretty caring guy.
Jebus replied
Quote:
It's funny how perception of a person can be affected….
I find it ironic how 2 people with entirely different views can clash online but in person can be the best of friends.
As an example, don't get Conan, and me in a conversation about religion (been there thanks) and expect that we won't leave fuming. But we get along great in RL (or at least i believe we do). Look at me and Consis, who have entirely different views here on HC and due to that(and of course our styles in general) tend to chat it up less than I do with others. For all I know, in RL, we could get along great (we could just never talk politics or war cuz we'd kill each other!!  ).
I take folks like Lee, Pan, Terje, and Guitar Guy that I'd love to get to know in person but for all I know we could be nothing alike and not get along.
(this should be in my other thread.)
This is now in my other thread!! lol
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"You went over my helmet??"
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Rage08
Famous Hero
Making it in the real world
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posted September 22, 2005 10:10 PM |
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Nice topic Jebus...
I'm not sure there's an easy explanation as to why we may get along with people differently in real life than on the internet... although it would seem easy to explain...
I think it has a lot to do with not being able to tell what kind of tone somebody is using when they're talking to you online... what kind of attitude they're giving you, you know?
There is a great example of this, actually, in the dude thread where Jebus assumed I was being sarcastic, but really that's just the type of humour I have.
I though I might want to mention to everyone on Heroes Community that I have very sarcastic humour in real life... it's just the best way I can be funny... but for people who don't know me, you may get the wrong idea. For the record, I don't like to hurt anybodies feelings or anything like that. I like to treat everyone as equal as possible...
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Consis
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
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posted September 22, 2005 11:11 PM |
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Hmm . . .
I've heard more than a few people describe the online chat experience as being an unregulated talk medium. Some people think that most of the persons who visit these places do so for the freedom of speech. In some cases, people think that online persons are attracted to the idea of being able to pretend to be someone they aren't. This is all true of course. Many people do exactly so. But I think people should remember the distinction between this and real life. False pretenses are exactly that, no matter how or where they happen. If a person is dishonest or of other nefarious intentions then they are responsible for their own actions; exactly as they would be in the real world. Having a lie told here at Heroes Community would be equally as dishonorable as in real life. (in my humble opinion)
I feel it's no good to pretend to be someone you aren't; especially if you're trying to have others believe the lie. Using a fictional avatar or creating a fictional character in the Glade is simply having creative imaginative fun. This is not the problem. I am the same person here (at Heroes Community) as I am in real life. I believe people(many HC members) understand and know all too well many of my faults and bad habits. And rightly so, I've made many mistakes and had some good things to say. Either way, you've always known it was the real me.
If life is a learning experience then one might not learn much if he/she isn't being his/her true self. For whatever experiences you encounter, they must occur to the real you. If you don't, then you risk prolonging the lie thus inevitably leading you away from your real self. Being yourself (your true self) comes in handy when your friends and family need your strength to carry them through some of life's most difficult times.
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Roses Are Red And So Am I
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted September 23, 2005 02:48 PM |
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(See what happens when we're not talking politics??
we actually agree! )
I think online will have the same overall dynamic as face to face interactions... it is true that you can come online and hide from your own reality or try to be someone else, but in the end your true colours come out.
You can be fake in person, but with time people tend to see you for who you really are. Online however that process can take a little more time. You'd almost have to always log on with the mindset that "you are that somebody else" because sooner or later, you will slip... and inconsistency will be your unveiling. I think the idea of beeing someone else can be attractive to some, but in the end, people need to learn to face themselves and own up to who they are. If you don't like what you see in the mirror, don't hide behind a mask, be honest and try to find ways to live with yourself in a way that you are comfortable. I lost a lot of friends after high school because I didn't like "pretending" to be someone "cooler" than I was. Personally I think Im fun to be with, and I am trying to learn to deal and correct my faults. I've learnt since (highschool) that I really wasn't happy in a "high maintenance" social group. My friends today know me for who I am (and if they don't, they must be blind and deaf). Funny thing is, online, Im learning to deal with conflicts. I feel the same hightened tension when I argue with someone here that I would in a real life conflict. This was my first realization that I'm the same online that I am in RL.
(it's funny cuz when I play any RPG, I want to be some bad***, but I end up beeing the same guy I am now.)
I guess in the end we need to stop running from who we are, and learn to accept ourselves (learn to grow) but more importantly, to accept others for who they are, and if we can't, then to learn to interact through respect.
My biggest frustration is when you see someone acting fake, or you know them well, and other's are blind to your warnings. My gf could say the same thing about me. She gives me a hard time since I'll defend my friends even when she feels im doing so blindly.
We've had many a fight due to this.
J
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"You went over my helmet??"
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Consis
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
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posted September 23, 2005 05:32 PM |
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Jebus,
I would indeed welcome a good visit to the local pub with Rage and yourself. It is yet another of those things in life that I simply know to be true. How do I know? I'm not sure. I simply know it.
And it's good that we'd be good friends. In real life I am surrounded by people who disagree with me. Not even a single one is aligned with my opinions. So if I disagree with someone in here, it's best for that person to realize they aren't alone; Hehehe . . . I think perhaps that I've grown too accustomed to having my opinion solely to myself. Ah well, que sera sera . . . Whatever will be will be.
Pass me an ale would you? My opinions are starting to get the better of me.
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Roses Are RedAnd So Am I
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted September 23, 2005 06:29 PM |
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Edited By: Jebus on 23 Sep 2005
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Makes you wonder what the dynamic would be if we all got together for a bbq now don't it!
(we just wouldn't be aloud to talk about politics, spirituality, religion, culture, the penal system, social responsibility, gas, .... hmmm guess there's always sports!  )
EDIT:
I guess we couldn't talk about sports cuz then we'd have created diff circles...
we could talk about ... ME!
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"You went over my helmet??"
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Consis
Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
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posted September 23, 2005 09:28 PM |
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Well . . .
I've found that the best thing to talk about at a BBQ is usually food recipes. I'm a big fan of marinated meats and artichoke/spinach dishes. With the right seasoning and cheeses, those dishes make a mean entree. Maybe some vanilla ice cream and apple pie . . . Oh, and also a small selection of various dark beer assortments to go with! That's what I call a small slice of heaven.
Could life be any better? I think not.
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Roses Are RedAnd So Am I
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Jebus
Promising
Supreme Hero
TheJester akaJeebs akaJebfoo
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posted September 23, 2005 09:45 PM |
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(Better say something about online relationships quick before this becomes a BBQ thread!!! )
... so in conclusion, acting fake is bad, and being honest to one's self and to others is the way to go!
(I think spam is a dish best serve cold )
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"You went over my helmet??"
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