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| Thread: Stupid Movies |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 · NEXT» |
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friendofgunnar
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able to speed up time
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posted November 29, 2006 09:17 AM |
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Stupid Movies
So I'm in the video shop looking for a movie to pick up during thanksgiving weekend and my eyes focus in on "Nacho Libre". I grab the box and start examining it and then this guy walks by and says "That's a stupid movie". Now, for a movie to inspire a guy to offer his opinion freely and instantly to a complete stranger indicates an exceptional level of stupidity.
So then today my wife is watching "Wedding Crashers" and after she finishes watching it she says "That was a stupid movie." This from a woman who acknowledges liking stupidly silly movies.
Stupidness in movies is quantifiable I think. If it's a comedy you figure out the ratio of jokes that are supposed to be funny compared to the number of jokes that actually are. If it's a drama then it's a simple running count of how many times it makes you go "huh?". There's always been movies like this but I'm looking for the creme de la creme. I'm looking for the stupidest movie ever made.
Here's my candidate for the stupidest movie ever: Scary Movie 3, by the Wayans brothers. I tend to judge a movie by how much of an impression it makes on me and how well I remember it. The only thing that I remember about this movie is the note that I attached to it when I returned it. "This movie is for retarded chimpanzees, can I have my money back please?"
And here's an honorable mention: D.E.B.S..
The premise is that there's a secret test contained within the SAT that identifies girls who will be good secret agents. The movie then is about one of the secret agent DEB girls who falls in love with the lesbian super-villain "Lucy Diamond". The only positive thing I can say about this movie is that wasn't just stupid, it was bizarrely stupid. It was like some kind of cardboard/marshmellow/fence-post flavor of stupid.
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RedSoxFan3
Admirable
Legendary Hero
Fan of Red Sox
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posted November 29, 2006 10:39 AM |
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Rather than just tell you about the dumbest movie I've ever seen, I'll start by telling the story of the trip to the movies.
It was a normal dinner in the campus cafeteria. The food wasn't all that great. School was getting pretty boring for me. I needed to blow off some steam. I was in a crappy mood and didn't feel like saying hi to the people I saw on a daily basis. I guess you could say it was a low-grade depression.
"Thhhhhhhhhh-ank you." I said stuttering as I always did. The 'th,' 's,' 'l,' 'r' and 'sh' words always gave me trouble, especially thank you and especially when the person wasn't looking me firmly in the eye. I always seemed to be able to speak more fluently when people were giving me their attention. I turned around and stared at the ground as I walked back main room.
"Hey," I said as I sat back down at the round table. There was a fair amount of talking tonight, since the food sucked as usual and people weren't really all that hungry. Most of the other guys had turned to their cafeteria crutches, Raisin Bran. Though for some reason one of the guys didn't like Raisin Bran and instead prefered to eat just regular old disgusting Bran Flakes. But we didn't call them Bran Flakes. Nope, at our table they were known as Feces Flakes, cause they taste like ****.
"Hey Bob," said Edward. He ran his tongue over his front teeth. "Why don't you use the good bowls? Those white ones can't hold ****. The black ones can actually hold more than 3 or 4 bites."
"Yeah but I don't like whole milk, and the black bowl makes the skim milk look disgusting, because it's more translucent whereas the whole milk is opaque."
*** TO BE CONTINUED ***
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Go Red Sox!
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Lord_Woock
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Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
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posted November 29, 2006 11:28 AM |
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Perhaps the stupidest movie I've ever seen
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Yolk and God bless.
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My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!
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TitaniumAlloy
Honorable
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Professional
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posted November 29, 2006 03:19 PM |
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the lady in the water
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John says to live above hell.
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Homer171
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted November 29, 2006 07:24 PM |
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When thinking really horrible one star movies one name allways gomes in to my mind: Hercules in New York! First Arnold movie ever! It's so bad that i laugh really hard when i watched it. There is scene where bear attacks Hercules in New York park and it's obvious that it's a man inside of a bear suit. It could not be any lamer than that. Good for laughs i suppose.
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russ
Promising
Supreme Hero
blah, blah, blah
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posted November 29, 2006 10:36 PM |
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FoG, just out of curiosity, what kind of comedies DO you like (if any)?
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friendofgunnar
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posted November 29, 2006 11:35 PM |
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Quote:
Hilarious, impossible not to laugh
That just confirms my observation that Peter Travers is hands down the stupidest movie critic in the world.
@Russ
For silly-funny "Wayne's World" takes the cake.
For brilliantly gross comedy I'd go for "Team America" (same guys that did South Park).
For clever-funny I'd recommend "40 year old virgin".
For sublime-funny it'd be a toss-up between "Dr. Strangelove" and "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou".
Man I saw Life Aquatic a few days back and I'm still laughing over it...
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russ
Promising
Supreme Hero
blah, blah, blah
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posted November 29, 2006 11:49 PM |
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Hmm... I guess tastes are different. I liked scary movie series (partially because I've watched most of the movies they were making fun of), but "40-yr old virgin" would be one of the stupidest movies ever in my books. It makes me think that it was created by a drill sargeant who read a "how to be funny" manual.
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ruby
Promising
Known Hero
crazed swede
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posted November 30, 2006 12:53 AM |
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Edited by ruby at 00:54, 30 Nov 2006.
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By far...the worst movie ever made.
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The Darker the Sky--
The Brighter the Stars-
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MightyMage
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of INSANITY and DELICIOUSNESS
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posted November 30, 2006 07:00 AM |
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They made this movie sound so good. I was VERY disapointed. I thought it was gay...nay...GHEY! (which is worse, because I said so)
I went to the theatre expecting this great movie and throughout the whole film I was convincing myself that it would get better.
The only good part about it was the popcorn.
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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friendofgunnar
Honorable
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able to speed up time
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posted November 30, 2006 10:24 AM |
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Quote:
The only good part about it was the popcorn.
LOL
I remember this one time I went to the movie and for some reason the popcorn and coke was the tastiest and most refreshing I'd ever had in my life. Can't remember the movie though. 
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kookastar
Honorable
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posted November 30, 2006 11:21 AM |
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Mirror Mask
I really thought I would like it...
The Kentucky Fried Movie
I put this one here... but not sure if it belongs... I haven't seen it in 15 years, but I loved it once lol. It is definately silly though - and not sure how funny it would be now
I'm going to try to track it down and re-evaluate!
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uhuh
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Cabranth
Adventuring Hero
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posted November 30, 2006 04:09 PM |
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Hello.
Kentucky Fried Movie!
Definitely something anyone who likes comic-parodies should at least try. I'm the first to admit not everyone will like it (have one friend who HATES it), but IMHO, the "A Fistfull of Yen" movie-within-movie is worth the price of admission all by itself, and many other parts are hilarious also ("If you're a Tarus, see a Florist") .
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Homer171
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted November 30, 2006 10:27 PM |
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I haven't seen Kindom of Heaven yet but i have heard it's pretty lame but i have seen Alexander and that movie was really bad movie.
There are good epic movies like Gladiator but Alexander was horrible movie. I wonder how director of Platoon and JFK could make that bad movie.
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Dingo
Responsible
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God of Dark SPAM
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posted December 01, 2006 01:23 AM |
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This one takes the whole pie.
Open Water
If you find a more stupid movie, I will give you a nickel.
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The Above Post/Thread/Idea Is CopyRighted by, The Dingo Corp.
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MightyMage
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posted December 01, 2006 05:52 AM |
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I actually liked Kingdom of Heaven. I own it on DVD which in about a year or so will be outdated and replaced by whichever disc wins in the
Blu Ray Disc vs. HD DVD war
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Though I must still bow
in awe for the awesomeness that is
MightyMage. For he is all I could ever
want to be! - OhforfSake
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friendofgunnar
Honorable
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posted December 01, 2006 11:29 AM |
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So what's up with this Blu-Ray thing and HD-DVD? Do we really need 20 gigs a disc? Does it come with some type of guarentee that the movie won't suck?
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Homer171
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posted December 01, 2006 06:12 PM |
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I haven't seen that Kingdom of Heaven so maby i should not have pointed it out cause it could be allright, who knows.
New Superman and Day after Tomorrow i didn't like either. Horrible movies for me anyway.
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russ
Promising
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blah, blah, blah
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posted December 01, 2006 06:15 PM |
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Oh yea! The Day After Tomorrow. That one is quite stupid.
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Iris
Responsible
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of Typos
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posted December 01, 2006 08:18 PM |
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I've always been one to never understand people who laugh at horror movies, but this one is definitely an exception:
Killer Klowns from Outer Space
Just read the title! Ooyy...
They kill humans by wrapping them in cotton candy, which then turns them into popcorn. There's this one awesome scene in a dark alley, where a human was attacked by a dinosaur. Of course, all they had to use were dolls, so you see the shadows of a Ken doll being mauled by a toy dinosaur.
If you're in the mood for a fun and interesting movie, check it out. 
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