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War-overlord
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Presidente of Isla del Tropico
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posted March 01, 2010 10:58 PM |
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Quote: This might clear up a thing or two methinks
I can be cynical at times, but never this cynical.
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Vote El Presidente! Or Else!
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Disturbed-Gnu
Supreme Hero
Pro Bacon Vodka Brewer
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posted March 01, 2010 11:24 PM |
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I actually have a pretty stupid problem!!
I have a huge crush on my best friend.. And i have had the crush for like 2 months now! but she has a boyfriend... And he is also one of my friends (Not close friends, but a friend)
The problem is i don't want to scare her away or make her mad at me..
But i have had a crush on one before! and that crush disapeared after some time..
But still!!
Love is complicated!
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted March 02, 2010 01:25 AM |
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Quote: Astounding how people who know so little about something can talk so much about it. It's like blind people arguing over colour spectrums and how the Mona Lisas smile is different from others.
So very true.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 03:36 AM |
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I'm reading that ladder theory, that must be a joke.
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted March 02, 2010 03:42 AM |
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Most of that theory stuff is a joke.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted March 02, 2010 07:53 AM |
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Mytical
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Chaos seeking Harmony
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posted March 02, 2010 08:31 AM |
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Edited by Mytical at 08:36, 02 Mar 2010.
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Mvass...would you take flying advice from somebody who has flown a plane, or from somebody who theorises about flying but has never flown a plane ever? While theory is all well and good, practical experience (ie known as trial and error) can lead to much more insight.
People are not machines, even though you can 'guess' what they will do, you can put the same input twice and get totally different results. Statistics tend to fly out the window when the HUMAN factor kicks in.
Edit : I've seen some relationships work that by all logic shouldn't have even been started. Including, but not limited to an (ex) NeoNazi marrying an African American. Catholic/Jewish, etc. Yet these relationships had some of the happiest people I've ever met in my life.
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Message received.
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 10:28 AM |
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Quote: I actually have a pretty stupid problem!!
I have a huge crush on my best friend.. And i have had the crush for like 2 months now! but she has a boyfriend... And he is also one of my friends (Not close friends, but a friend)
The problem is i don't want to scare her away or make her mad at me..
But i have had a crush on one before! and that crush disapeared after some time..
But still!!
Love is complicated!
What's wrong with you people, you are so afraid of expressing your feelings
Who the heck can get angry because of being loved?
You have two options: confront her about it (even in a joking manner, as I advised Dagoth to do - you can always turn it into a joke if you feel the results will be humiliating), or burn the bridges - end the friendship.
The sorrow that follows is NOT worth it.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted March 02, 2010 10:31 AM |
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Edited by william at 10:32, 02 Mar 2010.
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You don't have to end the friendship, you also don't have to confront her. Why end the friendship over something like that? That's one of the stupidest things I've heard and something I definitely would NOT recommend you to do.
If she has a boyfriend, leave it alone and don't try to do anything. I've had crushes on girls who were with someone but I just left it alone and it went away after a while. Confronting her is not worth it and neither is ending the friendship.
So yeah, whatever you do, I strongly recommend NOT doing what Doomforge said, and I just recommend leaving it alone.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 10:38 AM |
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Friendship <<< lack of depression
you can get new friends, but getting rid of depression takes ages.
been there done that. Not to mention that high school "friendships" usually aren't worth much. Ask your parents, your older friends, whatever, how many friends do they still have from that period. I have just one of at least 10 people I considered good friends from that time.
Mind health is much more important than some petty friendship that has high probability of just ending in college just like that, one two three, gone.
I just agree with JJ, he said exactly the thing I have in my mind.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted March 02, 2010 10:39 AM |
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Yes, I've dealt with depression a lot and I know exactly how this feels (been in a similar situation before), but in the long run, I thought I made the right choice because at least I didn't lose people that I liked to talk to and could continue to do so long afterwards.
That's just me though. Who knows, maybe you're right.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 10:42 AM |
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Well, you may be right too Depends on the person.
When I noticed I start caring a bit "too much" for my old female friend, knowing she's really caring for her boyfriend and I wouldn't stand a chance, I just ended it.
I squashed the sadness and saved myself from the depression that would so totally follow. I am very happy I did that. That was a great decision.
And I found new friends. People aren't hard to come by if you're looking for "just" friends.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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Binabik
Responsible
Legendary Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 11:59 AM |
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Quote: Not to mention that high school "friendships" usually aren't worth much. Ask your parents, your older friends, whatever, how many friends do they still have from that period.
Everyone is different, but my own experience is that it's the friendships from childhood and youth that endure. Up through our early 20s we spend a lot of time with our friends. As we start to get older we get married, we have children, we have careers. Our priorities and responsibilities change. Adult friends become fewer and fewer, and family becomes more important. It's the friendships that have withstood the test of time that endure. Newer friendships are still there, but it's the older friendships that are a constant, something that we can fall back on.
As I said, everyone is different. Maybe I'm just fortunate to have friends that I've known for over 50 years. I literally don't remember a time when they weren't friends. Sometimes I feel that they don't know me as well as people I've met more recently, but one thing I know for certain, they will always be there, and they will always listen, and they will always be my friend.
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JollyJoker
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 12:19 PM |
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Quote: Maybe I'm just fortunate to have friends that I've known for over 50 years. I literally don't remember a time when they weren't friends. Sometimes I feel that they don't know me as well as people I've met more recently, but one thing I know for certain, they will always be there, and they will always listen, and they will always be my friend.
Yeah, I think, with "old" friends, that is, with friends from childhood and youth, from a certain point onwards you don't register any changes - or let's call it more correct, the imprints life and maturing leaves which may lead to dormant traits coming to the forefront of a personality and so on: you have something to build upon, which is the friendship of the two persons you WERE, THEN. So meeting an old friend is a bit like going back in time, because it's how we imagine them.
In a way, this process takes place as well in marriages or relationships that began way back - at high school or college, in any event when you were very young. When those people divorce 20 years later, they suddenly realize that the person they were in love with 20 years ago, has vanished somewhat or at least drastically changed.
Anyway, I like both, a few friendships from times ancient and new ones, to, well, be who you are NOW.
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"Nobody dies a virgin ... Life f*cks us all." - Kurt Cobain
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 02:14 PM |
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Bin, JJ - I'm too young to relate, unfortunately
All I can say is that once people change environment, a lot of people just turn their backs on them. At least that's what happened to me and pretty much everyone I know, including my parents and family.
Those who remain are very rare. Which brought my point, that we shouldn't suffer because of the "here and now" type of friends. It's actually easier, at least for me, to assume we will part ways when we finish the current step (whether it's high school, college or a temporary job), meaning, when something about them bothers me, makes me sad, depressed (such as an infatuation impossible to fulfill due to many reasons, the "subject" being in relationship for example...) - it's not worth it, in other words, I'd rather end such a friendship, avoiding contact with such a person than remain as her "friend" which at this point brings more sadness than joy and has a high probability of dissolving into nothing after the remaining X years of school/college/whatever has passed.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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TheDeath
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
with serious business
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posted March 02, 2010 03:32 PM |
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Quote: Mvass...would you take flying advice from somebody who has flown a plane, or from somebody who theorises about flying but has never flown a plane ever? While theory is all well and good, practical experience (ie known as trial and error) can lead to much more insight.
I'm not mvass and my stance is probably different but here's what: If someone who has flown a plane, was struck by lightning, but still survived and says it... and then some statistician comes with statistics about planes (in this region, even better) struck by lightning, guess who I would listen to?
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The above post is subject to SIRIOUSness.
No jokes were harmed during the making of this signature.
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DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
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posted March 02, 2010 04:46 PM |
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Quote:
Who the heck can get angry because of being loved?
I fear thou doest not comprehend.
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If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted March 02, 2010 04:49 PM |
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Quote: Mvass...would you take flying advice from somebody who has flown a plane, or from somebody who theorises about flying but has never flown a plane ever? While theory is all well and good, practical experience (ie known as trial and error) can lead to much more insight.
I'd rather take advice from the guy who says, "I know that flying this way leads to crashes, so I'm not going to try it. Instead, I'm going to fly like this," instead of the guy who tries the same thing every time and crashes.
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Eccentric Opinion
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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted March 02, 2010 05:04 PM |
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Oh please we've had that exact same argument with a guy building a wall some pages ago oO. And probably in other forms too. Talk about running in circles lol. Doesn't seem to boarder most though (mvass and TheDeath I think your replies were the exact same. So in the interest of saving this thread from futher derailment just look back a few pages and watch me convince you you guys were wrong, atleast partially).
Love is sunshine on a rainy day.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
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posted March 02, 2010 05:12 PM |
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Love is a cruel and unforgiving mistress.
Now, BEND OVER!
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If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
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