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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted September 15, 2009 03:01 PM |
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There was a sale on better quality curtains down the road.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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lucky_dwarf
Promising
Supreme Hero
Visiting
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posted September 19, 2009 04:03 AM |
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Mytical-The rest of humanity from having to see Aculias naked, thank goodness for that!!
that would be too easy to do, just put him in a metal box.
3 points
ihor-WOW players from the rest of humanity who are lucky not to play it. They live in another world.
Think about your wording man! Its to boring how your saying it. (The geeks of Azeroth from the jocks of earth)
3 points for potential -1 point for lack of imagination -1 for staleness of material= 1 point
OhforfSake-Numbers
... um yeah (my response: http://www.ebroadcast.com.au/blahdocs/uploads//wtf_panda_2050.jpg)
0 points for not being funny and not making sense.
DagothGares-It was there to make sure Winston Churchill couldn't get to the communists!
(flips open history book) prime minister during world war 2.... LOL I gets it, 2 points.
Trashid-China from Brazil, cos they were too close.
Like the sea wasnt enough 
3 points
del_diablo- "What about the 'Iron Curtain' grandfather?" little Schultz asked.
His grandfather, an old man having surviving eating more candy than the average man in the streets looked at him and began the story:
"Once upon a decade, during the winter marches of the French-British alliances it happen. They got into a disagreement with their hetrophobic leader of the alliance, so they made curtains of iron betwhen the male and female tents. Or at the least so they claimed. The curtains was made out of steel you see, so anybody who attempted to get to the other tents did figur out why they could not. Until a wise man figured out how to walk around it."
Good thing he did or we would be extinct.
2 points
Drakon-Deus-Hogwarts from the Muggle world.
Not funny, but since wrongness is what is judged, 1 point
1 point
Shyranis-Separates the Pope's undergarments from the rest of the world's virgin eyes and... noses.
Berny-Mac- The Iron Curtain was a secret US military project involving the Island Monkey Coalition (IMC). The point of the Iron Curtain project was to separate the IMC from the general American public. Emperor Monkey, and his advisers, which includes General Chim Panzee. In 2004, the IMC was revealed to the American public by famed Blogwriter Michael Cecire, brother of the Rhodes Scholar, Maria Cecire, and Heroes Community Contributer, Bernard Cecire, also known as Berny-Mac.
In simplicity, the Iron Curtain was meant to keep the General American public from the knowledge of the existence of the Island Monkey Coalition.
OMG ROFL, its so wrong I can feel myself chocking at such wrongness.
3 points.
kraken-Ed, Edd, N' Edy from the Candy Store
With theyre luck
2 points
mvassilev-I don't know, but it rusted through.
Off topic, sorry man.
0 points
Lexxan-The_Gootch's Charisma
Dont know who he is, but its wrong
2 points
pei-John bobbit and malehood
Try dividing that
3 points
mamgaeater- its not a good ballast, i'll tell you that
??? not the question
0 points
blizzardboy-Sharp objects from football fans.
That means you need to remove theyre fingers.
2 points
alcibiades-Xerdux from the MSHQ.
Not sure what the fun in that is...
1 point
phoenix0983-Me from the internet
If you posted this, they failed 
3 points
AlkarRahn-Nothing. Elvis thought it would make a nice cape.
HAHAHAHA your gona get on top if you keep making good entries.
3 points
Trogdor-There was a sale on better quality curtains down the road.
Off-topic, needs 2 things to be separated.
0 points.
Leader board after round 28:
1. Mytical - 9
2. Berny-Mac- 8
3.Shyranis 8
4. Trashid - 8
5. Lexxan 8
6. Ihor - 7
7. alcibiades 6
8. Jirriki9 - 6
9. AlkarRahn 6
10. blizzardboy 6
11. phoenix0983 6
12. Trogdor - 6
13. Ednaguy 5
14. OhforfSake- 4
15. kraken 4
16. pei 3
17. DagothGares - 3
18. mamgaeater - 2
19. del_diablo- 2
20. Drakon-Deus 2
21. Mvassilev 1
Round 29:
Describe what a dwarf looks like, what they do all day, where they live etc.
(everything is of course, is COMPLETELY wrong and funny)
EDIT: thank you for noticing, the reason i keep mixing these up is probably cuz i keep all the rounds in one folder, so i get confused.
Never be afraid to say.
@Mvass, off topic is off topic, you were the one who chose to post it, not I, deal with it 
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So much has changed in my absence.
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted September 19, 2009 04:47 AM |
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Quote:
mvassilev-I don't know, but it rusted through.
Off topic, sorry man.
0 points
Lame.
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Eccentric Opinion
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Berny-Mac
Promising
Legendary Hero
Lord Vader
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posted September 19, 2009 05:28 AM |
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a dwarf...hmmm...a dwarf...isn't that one of those power drinks that we get at seven-eleven? Yeah...it kinda looks magenta-ish, and tastes like...gatorade...with too much syrup...maple syrup...canadian syrup...damn canadians...
Anyways, the Dwarf super drink was made in Canada by Evon of the Yukon Co. in 2004. However, due to the rise of the IMC, sales have been increasingly desperate, resulting in ads made by Uwe Boll. This of course led to the Evon of the Yukon's destruction and bankruptcy. 2007, Dwarf was resurrected by Archangel, another Loaning and Banking service. However, Imp (another powerade drink) orchestrated the demise of the Dwarf. However, Imp soon fell under the heavy might of Dwarf stocks, founded in Evon of the Yukon's grand new business plan. However, when the recession came down upon us, times were hard. All of the sudden, fresh new students from certain liberal Academies cut down on the Imp industry once and for all, ending its Reign of Terror (Kai?). Certain other media players soon joined the fight. With the liberal media's eyes now fixed on Dwarf, it seemed that it would finally die...and it did, because the Archangel Banking industries went into the dust, quickly replaced with the more powerful, and more imperialistic Seraph Banking industry. However, unable to get Dwarf back on its feet, it viciously attacked the liberal media and their ways in sort of a "divine vengeance". Greek companies such as Elvin United and Alcibiades Corp. started to support the Dwarf as well, which was now nicknamed as "Lucky_Dwarf" due to great help from many other various companies. Eventually, it was powered up once more by Trogdor Furniture Industries, which has announced its five hundreth and ninety fifth grand furniture sale, and will be doing so tomorrow as well. Now with great power came great responsibility as Dwarf soon took the stock markets by storm and took down Government powered Titans such as Citibank, Lazlo Car Companies, and Wachovia. Now, Dwarf is at the height of its power and will soon be recognized as the major leading powerade drink ever...
____________
Skyrim RP? YES!
Here it is!
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Berny-Mac
Promising
Legendary Hero
Lord Vader
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posted September 19, 2009 05:31 AM |
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yo, why do i have 5 points now when i had 5 points before even though you just awarded me another three?
that means i should have 8 or sumthing.
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Skyrim RP? YES!
Here it is!
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Mytical
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Chaos seeking Harmony
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posted September 19, 2009 07:14 AM |
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Dwarves - Standing an average of 12' tall, and 6" wide they are known to be very clean shaven and hate facial hair of any kind.
They hate enclosed places, and love the sea, in fact most Dwarves are known for their fishing ability. Sadly they have no craftmanship or ability to make anything, so their boats often sink quickly but they are fabulous swimmers so it is not much of a problem for them.
With their eternal friendship with the Elves, they have created huge forest homes, living only on the top of the highest trees. All the crafted items comes from the elves, but the dwarves supply the elves with artistic items and as much fish as the elves can eat.
They detest metals, gems, and ores and trade for just about anything that isn't one of those items. They are highly alergic to a lot of metals, causing them to have fits of sneezing if closer then 10'.
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Message received.
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alcibiades
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
of Gold Dragons
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posted September 19, 2009 07:44 AM |
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Dwarves are closely related to Stone Dragons. They are covered in a hard stone-like material, as well as beautiful crystal. Their wings are entirely useless for flight, but they help attract mates. The dwarves with the most brilliant and colorful crystals are more likely to mate.
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What will happen now?
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ihor
Supreme Hero
Accidental Hero
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posted September 19, 2009 09:22 AM |
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Edited by ihor at 09:23, 19 Sep 2009.
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Quote:
3 points for potential -1 point for lack of imagination -1 for staleness of material= 1 point
To be honest, I have 7pts, not 9pts. Maybe +1pts for fair play? . Joke.
Quote:
Describe what a dwarf looks like, what they do all day, where they live etc.
All dwarves live in Laplandia, they have round face, white hair and friendly smile. They wear only white pants and white thongs(and white socks in severe winters). All the day dwarves play snowballs, drink rakia, then again play snowballs, then again drink rakia, then go to sleep. No! Dwarves never sleep. They wait for a time to play a jokes on each other.
One day in the year the oldest dwarf announces the operation "Ho-Ho-Ho" and every dwarf in the village gives their red coats a dust, wears it, takes his red bag, whistles for the relay of elks and brings a present to a child.
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Your advertisement could be
here only for 100$ per day.
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ohforfsake
Promising
Legendary Hero
Initiate
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posted September 19, 2009 12:30 PM |
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@lucky_dwarf
Well I can't help you haven't seen the same stuff that I've, you thought 42 was funny, but probably only because you'd seen it in the Hitchikers guide , I thought the numbers answer was even funnier, but then again, I guess it shows how subjective this kind of fun is. 
Anyway:
Dwarfs are selender and beautiful as well as annoying. They live in forests where they molest small animals and play boring music all night long. For RPG's they are a perfect choice for depressed and sociopathic players who feel undervalued and misunderstood. Suggested jobs: hairdresser, vixen, goth poet.
Again, if you know where it comes from I think you'll find it funny, and if not, well that's your loss.
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Trashid
Famous Hero
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posted September 19, 2009 02:01 PM |
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Edited by Trashid at 14:58, 19 Sep 2009.
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Dwarves are race of non-living female ducks, similar to garden pink flamingos. They live about 1-2 years, and copulate every 5 years of their life. They dont have mouth. They eat dogs, while the dogs are about to piss them. Every dwarf can tell a long story. Usually, they end their talking after 5 seconds of trying. Their favourite drink is ofcourse non-alcoholic vodka. If you want the dwarf to sing, you have to piss him, and after a while you will sing.
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Trogdor
Legendary Hero
Words in a custom title
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posted September 19, 2009 02:56 PM |
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Dwarves often look like giant penguins with Doritos for eyes and ears. Usually it is difficult to tell one dwarf from another, insisting that they all be named Captain James May the Slow, regardless of birth gender. Dwarves are slackers who spend all day on the Internet playng flash games until they pass out. Dwarves are squatters and are quite picky about it, preferring that everything be clean so that can leave a huge mess when they evicted from these abodes. Police are in the middle of an investigation on how some dwarves are involved in illegal gamblings, with over 20 arrests being made each week.
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"Through the power of the dollar you can communicate with the dead." - Artu
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shyranis
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted September 19, 2009 03:39 PM |
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Edited by shyranis at 16:17, 19 Sep 2009.
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' Dwarves are typically bitter descendants of the neanderthals who have never moved out of their parents' basements. Whilst searching the Caves of Caerbannog with Alyson Hannigan, Mother Maybelle Carter, and Lord Voldemort, I fought many a dwarf with my sword.
For an unknown reason, almost all dwarfs' right leg is longer than the other, causing them to lean to the left. (see photo for proof of this phenomenon.)
Dwarvess typically have their names tatooed on their ass (see backside of photo for proof of this phenomenon.)
Dwarvess are hard workers, but are only known to work in making Spazzstick, caffeinate lip balm. Many other people ask them to do other things, but those people are usually eaten.
One notable gang of dwarvess, the Finnish band Finndwarves, are noted for their bloodlust, awesome music, and hatred of all noobs, humans, and people who work in any kind of kiosk. They really hate kiosks. No-one knows why, because, whenever the word "kiosk" is mentioned, they fly into a blinding rage, and within 30 minutese everyone within exactly 17.371miles is dead.
If you need to kill dwarves, hunting them down, while there is not a clemency going on, looking under skirts is your best bet - thats where they hide.
A "dwarf" is an anonymous coward to lurks in chat rooms and who has nothing better to do than hassle people with silly posts.
____________
Youtube has terminated my account without reason.
Please express why it should be reinstated on
Twitter.
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pei
Famous Hero
Fresh Air.
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posted September 20, 2009 06:50 AM |
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Morbid Channel News! with zillion-time Emmy award-winning anchor Pei Per Viu.
Good evening. I'm Pei, what you're about to hear is a Morbid Channel News exclusive.
Scientists have discovered the true nature of Dwarfes.
The term Dwarf means infidel in elven words as dwarfs have been known to make night inflitrations in the elven woods in the look for some action,.. although the fact is that elf women do not enjoy the cuddle and talk act.
Dwarves are not very large, with the exception of baby dwarves, who are among the largest creatures in Erathia. Our short friends are used to wear beards just like blizzardboy.
Morbid Channel News has gathered recommendations and important notes so as to avoid any harm caused by these creatures:
1-Let grow as many facial hair as possible.
2-Dont leave your wife alone if you have dwarfs in the front yard.
3-Never leave undrinked beer on the house.
4-Always to remember! Dont think "its not going to happen to me" as dwarfs always get lucky. 
Scientists also say idiotic people think that dwarves are attracted by peaceful enviroments and thats why they hung around magic gardens but recent studies have shown that they party 24 x 7 with mystic mushrooms.
These fellows are mysterious creatures indeed... known by others wifes as great lovers, some say they are the soul of a party while others say they simple dont bathe.
It is estimated that over five million stacks of dwarves are killed a year, experts maintain that this is related to the boom of the Necromancer Midget Theatre.
We hope this rate stays on a growing curve and as for you HC...
You stay classy.
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Kraken
Famous Hero
I just love being elemental
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posted September 21, 2009 03:03 AM |
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All you need to know, is that there are no Dwarf Women! Dwarves just pop out from Holes in the Ground!
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Vini Vidi Vici
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lucky_dwarf
Promising
Supreme Hero
Visiting
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posted September 25, 2009 10:55 PM |
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I will work on your entries, if you have any to add please do so.
EDIT:
Berny-Mac OMG to awesome for words!!!
4 points
Mytical Allergy to metal ^_^
3 points
alcibiades Hmmm, havent I seen this description on stone dragons?
2 points
Ihor- nice one
1.5 points
OhforfSake Nope, not a clue but cleverness gets you
2.5 points
Trashid its so full of contradictions it earns you
3 points
Trogdor Rich imagination, but highly wrong.
3 points
Shyranis Lolz *cough*
3 points
Pei- *Heart attack due to wrongness*
3 points
kraken Not that funny or wrong
1 point
Leader board after round 29:
1. Berny-Mac- 13
2. Mytical - 12
3.Shyranis 11
4. Trashid - 11
5. Ihor 10.5
6. Trogdor - 9
7. Lexxan 8
8. alcibiades 8
9. OhforfSake- 6.5
10. AlkarRahn 6
11. blizzardboy 6
12. phoenix0983 6
13. Jirriki9 - 6
14. pei 6
15. kraken 5
16. Ednaguy 5
17. DagothGares - 3
18. mamgaeater - 2
19. del_diablo- 2
20. Drakon-Deus 2
21. Mvassilev 1
Round 30:
Harvard is the top school of what?
(i am sorry if my judging skills are bothering you)
____________
So much has changed in my absence.
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shyranis
Promising
Supreme Hero
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posted September 26, 2009 07:42 PM |
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Pornographic Graffiti Linedancing...
(PS. Replace the word Dwarf with Troll my last post to see what it's REALLY about)
____________
Youtube has terminated my account without reason.
Please express why it should be reinstated on
Twitter.
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Berny-Mac
Promising
Legendary Hero
Lord Vader
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posted September 26, 2009 08:03 PM |
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Quote:
(PS. Replace the word Dwarf with Troll my last post to see what it's REALLY about)
Yeah, the band, Finntrolls. Great stuff.
anyways, Harvard is obviously the top school for kindergartners. It's primary focus is teaching them about dwarves, sombreros, and the evilness of the IMC (not them again!!!). They also teach some other things, like the Spanish Inquisition, but we'd never expect them.
"NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION! OUR MAIN WEAPON IS FEAR! FEAR AND SURPRISE! OUR TWO MAIN WEAPONS ARE FEAR, AND SURPRISE, AND AN ALMOST FANATICAL DEVOTION TO THE POPE! OUR FOUR MAIN WEAPONS ARE-! I'll come again..."
Well...I certainly didn't expect the Spanish Inquisition to pop up!
"NOBODY EXPECTS THE SPANISH INQUISITION!"
Good lord...
____________
Skyrim RP? YES!
Here it is!
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alcibiades
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
of Gold Dragons
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posted September 26, 2009 10:02 PM |
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Harvard is the top school of wizardry, with famous wizards Dumbdorf as headmaster.
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What will happen now?
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DagothGares
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
No gods or kings
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posted September 26, 2009 10:04 PM |
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Top school of new guinea.
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If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
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Trashid
Famous Hero
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posted September 26, 2009 11:38 PM |
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Harvard is the top school of dustmen. The school is located on uninhabited island No Name Island. The dustmen have a lot of work there, cleaning the beach from sand.
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This thread is pages long: 
