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| Thread: I accept your challenge! |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 · «PREV / NEXT» |
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Keksimaton
Promising
Supreme Hero
Talk to the hand
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posted February 23, 2010 12:58 PM |
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I applaud you TheDeath, your quip may have been even wittier than intended. 
mvass: Would you please share with us the information gathered in your research? Would you also please give us an explanation of the pillar theory and enlighten us on how you came to such conclusions from your observations?
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Noone shall pass, but no one besides him shall pass.
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ohforfsake
Promising
Legendary Hero
Initiate
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posted February 23, 2010 01:27 PM |
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Quote:
Lol, you complain about the post limit in 24 hours and instead of contributing, you post crap like this? Either, do something about it (contribute better and more constructively) or don't complain and just put up with it.
Um no?
First, I thought this was the VW.
Second, nothing was really happening yesterday, I evaluated there was no problem in me burning some posts as I won't be posting much today anyway.
The real deal is that it is not something that should be necessary to consider.
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Living time backwards
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted February 23, 2010 03:31 PM |
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But if you think it's a problem then you just don't do that, end of story. Also the "I thought it was the VW" is a pile of crap and you know it. I just find it funny that you complain about it but do nothing to actually help yourself get rid of it, but whatever.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Arcax
Promising
Famous Hero
Its quite hot inside...
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posted February 23, 2010 04:22 PM |
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We are talking about this 'looking' for date pillar strategy ? If yes, then HELL, ITS WORKING!
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 04:37 PM |
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Actually, it's not that stupid. It's better just to live and do what you love while being single. It is no good to allow desperation to rule you. Sure, you can't expect to find a partner while sitting on your butt whole day, never talking to anyone. But if you're doing something you like, you inevitably meet people who do the same. Which is a solid ground to start at.
It's not that stupid, yeah, but it's not perfect either. If, say, you like swimming, but you never talk to anyone, never initiate conversations, just swim, dress up and go home, it's sort of problematic to meet anyone. I'd say, chatting with people while doing what you love is a great way to find someone with similar interests. Similar interests usually mean you have something common to talk about, and from there, you just watch how the situation develops.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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Darkshadow
Legendary Hero
Cerise Princess
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posted February 23, 2010 05:53 PM |
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Quote:
Actually, it's not that stupid. It's better just to live and do what you love while being single. It is no good to allow desperation to rule you. Sure, you can't expect to find a partner while sitting on your butt whole day, never talking to anyone. But if you're doing something you like, you inevitably meet people who do the same. Which is a solid ground to start at.
It's not that stupid, yeah, but it's not perfect either. If, say, you like swimming, but you never talk to anyone, never initiate conversations, just swim, dress up and go home, it's sort of problematic to meet anyone. I'd say, chatting with people while doing what you love is a great way to find someone with similar interests. Similar interests usually mean you have something common to talk about, and from there, you just watch how the situation develops.
Crazy dictator chicks?
Me wants!
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Arcax
Promising
Famous Hero
Its quite hot inside...
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posted February 23, 2010 06:00 PM |
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Edited by Arcax at 18:01, 23 Feb 2010.
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Practicing your hobbies is one of the best ways but still there are some exceptions.
Some while ago, when I had quite a rough, lets say period of life, I turned myself from easy going and social guy into some kind of dull,cynical and always tired hermit. A girl from uni showed some interest in me. Not my piece of cake, but anyway I did nothing to draw her attention.
After spending some time with each other she made some kind of love confession, how lovely am I etc etc (I know, sounds vain). But still, as always, I didnt get how women mind is working. Short, impolite answers and my nasty behaviour only drawed her closer, not rejected her.
Being pillar and nasty has its merits.
(I dumped her)
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 06:04 PM |
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Edited by Fauch at 18:06, 23 Feb 2010.
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Girls with bf's are wasting air!
you were thinking about the planet
what about being a social hermit? 
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ohforfsake
Promising
Legendary Hero
Initiate
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posted February 23, 2010 07:33 PM |
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Will, you complaining over someone who made a complain in a thread that is not about that topic. Don't you think it belongs in another thread? Write back there and I'll reply to it, together with other people when the thread seem to not get much attention anymore. Also if a moderator please would move this conversation to that thread, I find it fits better there, where it at least is not that much off topic, eventhough I can't see how my actions should have any relevance to the posting limit, unless you think I am such a spammer. A suggestion is not evaluated upon the behaviour of the one who makes the suggestion, but upon the reasoning behind it. Do you e.g. say that fat people aren't allowed to tell other fat people about the health hazard of being fat? I doubt it.
Quote:
But if you think it's a problem then you just don't do that, end of story.
Here's the deal. I have 20 posts pr. 24 hour. I am here for my own purposes, those are in most, if not all, cases to learn stuff and to have a bit of fun. If I evaluate I have plenty of posts left in regard to the time I expect to be using here, then it is up to me, if I use those last posts for the day on some fun.
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Also the "I thought it was the VW" is a pile of crap and you know it.
Um, no it isn't.
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I just find it funny that you complain about it but do nothing to actually help yourself get rid of it, but whatever.
Like what? Point is I shouldn't be doing anything, it is a purposeless barrier, or do you think it really makes the community better that I have this barrier?
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Living time backwards
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted February 23, 2010 07:36 PM |
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Quote:
Like what? Point is I shouldn't be doing anything, it is a purposeless barrier, or do you think it really makes the community better that I have this barrier?
Like has been said, it is not purposeless, it does make the community better in that it makes people think more about what they post and hopefully contribute better.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Arcax
Promising
Famous Hero
Its quite hot inside...
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posted February 23, 2010 07:42 PM |
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Edited by Arcax at 19:43, 23 Feb 2010.
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Yeah, they are wasting tons of other precious things. Money, time, life 
And I cant tell you Fauch, I was experimenting and developing this hermit mode in secrecy for whole 3 months.
My precious pillar/hermit/social strategy...
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 08:28 PM |
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keksi:
Those questions are quite valid and I shall attempt to answer them.
The method of my research has been twofold - the observation of successes and the observation of failures. Both among my friends and among others (people's parents, etc) there are successful and unsuccessful relationships. It is clear that whether a relationship is successful or not is not just a matter of chance - there are reasons why relationships fail, and there are ways of avoiding them. Most successful relationships have something in common, even if those in them do not necessarily realise it.
To explain what pillar theory is, perhaps it is better to compare it to its opposite. Suppose a guy wants to get into a relationship, so he goes to parties and attempts to pick up girls there. Suppose he succeeds in sleeping with them, and now he wants to pursue the relationship. However, he immediately runs into a problem - the girl he's with is the kind who will go to a party and sleep with a guy she just met. Though that makes her "more accessible", it is generally considered to be an undesirable trait in a committed relationship. The guy runs into other problems as well: he doesn't know her at all - doesn't know what she's like, what she likes to do, what her interests are, what she values, etc - all things important for a successful relationship. And so it has a high chance of failure, as there are more people who are incompatible than who are compatible.
Pillar theory, on the other hand, treats relationships in a more rational way. You say to yourself, "What is it that I like? What is it that I want? And who is it that I am?" And so you get to know people who might have those qualities, and not pursue a relationship with them yet until you are quite sure that they are indeed persons of virtue with whom you share interests. Meanwhile, you are also displaying your virtues and interests. And so the relationship is much more likely to succeed because there is much less guesswork involved.
Aristotle writes about this in Nicomachean Ethics. Though he talks about friendship rather than love, very similar principles can be applied here.
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Eccentric Opinion
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 10:57 PM |
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And I cant tell you Fauch, I was experimenting and developing this hermit mode in secrecy for whole 3 months.
well, hermit mode eventually made me less cynical, more dynamic and sociable
Quote:
It is clear that whether a relationship is successful or not is not just a matter of chance - there are reasons why relationships fail, and there are ways of avoiding them. Most successful relationships have something in common, even if those in them do not necessarily realise it.
hint : it has probably something to do with communication. efficient communication and trust.
Quote:
You say to yourself, "What is it that I like? What is it that I want? And who is it that I am?"
hum, that doesn't sound stupid. what if you are unable to answer those questions?
what about "who do I want to become?"
it's not so important that the girl share common interest with you.
you may think that the most interests you have in common, the better it is, but having completely different interests could be very interested, because you'll discover lots of new things thanks to each other. of course it implies to be at least a bit open minded.
opposite characters may be a strength or a curse I suppose.
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 11:28 PM |
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Quote:
what if you are unable to answer those questions?
Then you have absolutely no business looking for a relationship.
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Eccentric Opinion
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 23, 2010 11:49 PM |
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I don't think so.
in my case, it is not the answer to those questions which determined which girl, it's the girl who "gave" me the answers to those questions.
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ohforfsake
Promising
Legendary Hero
Initiate
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posted February 23, 2010 11:53 PM |
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I might have got it wrong. I understood it as he said that those who could not answer those question aren't mature enough to seek relationship, or something like that.
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Living time backwards
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wog_edn
Promising
The Nothingness
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posted February 24, 2010 12:19 AM |
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Quote:
Quote:
what if you are unable to answer those questions?
Then you have absolutely no business looking for a relationship.
I didn't know what I was looking for, and I wasn't looking for a relationship either. I think that's pretty much something that just happens when it's the right one, not necessarily someone you have been looking for. The person might even be entirely different from the type of person you thought you would end up with.
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Fauch
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted February 24, 2010 03:43 PM |
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it seems to apply to my case
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phoenixreborn
Promising
Legendary Hero
Unicorn
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posted February 24, 2010 04:16 PM |
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Was a challenge issued?
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Bask in the light of my glorious shining unicorn.
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TheDeath
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
with serious business
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posted February 24, 2010 04:34 PM |
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Quote:
hint : it has probably something to do with communication. efficient communication and trust.
Not always, fauch. Many 'mature' relationships actually break down because of disagreements, not because of cheating or becoming bored or the other "common" stuff.
Yes you can reach compromises between your interests, but seriously, I am talking about long-term relationships. You will get tired of compromises and likewise will probably your partner.
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The above post is subject to SIRIOUSness.
No jokes were harmed during the making of this signature.
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