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Heroes Community > Other Side of the Monitor > Thread: The Self-Criticism thread
Thread: The Self-Criticism thread This thread is 8 pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 · «PREV / NEXT»
frostwolf
frostwolf


Famous Hero
livin' in a bottle of vodka
posted December 29, 2004 09:26 PM

1) Extremely arrogant.
2) Over-confident
3) I don't bother about anything almost. (During a 5 minute 6.0 earthquake at the 7'th floor all I could say was '****, don't let my computer get cut off)
4) I hate my parents, though they are very kind and understanding persons.
5) I basically hate everybody who I see as inferior (and I see almost everybody as inferior), though I have very high respect for others.
6) I love vodka and music more than anything. (My girlfriend is slowly changing that)
7) I tend to drink a lot.
8) I spend a lot of money on booze.
9) No self-respect.
10) Despise this self-destructing, blind, hating  world.

____________
What can you expect from a world where everybody lives because they're too afraid to commit suicide?


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Lord_Woock
Lord_Woock


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Daddy Cool with a $90 smile
posted December 29, 2004 10:34 PM

I start things and then don't finish them.
____________
Yolk and God bless.
---
My buddy's doing a webcomic and would certainly appreciate it if you checked it out!

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Shenjairo
Shenjairo


Known Hero
Simsalabim
posted December 30, 2004 04:46 PM

I started to write a list, but stopped at number 18. I don't really think this thread is the best idea, I come here to get my mind off things and to lighten up and this kind of thread is rather depressive to me. Maybe I'll write here on another day, but then again maybe not. I will get into disagreements with at least one person if I post my list.
____________

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TheRealDeal
TheRealDeal


Promising
Supreme Hero
Foobum* of Justice!
posted December 30, 2004 04:56 PM

1: I drink 2 much.
2: I talk 2 much.
3: I'm 2 lazy.
4: I think i'm better than i actually am.
5: I might get agressive if i don't have things my way.
6: I never finish what i start
7: I have some sort of weird humor
8: I don't help as much as i should.
9: Often i act before i think.
10: My english sucks.
11: I use 2 much time on my computer.
____________
*We all know the that Foobum is the class of all that is Cake.

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Leo_Lion
Leo_Lion


Honorable
Supreme Hero
The 5th Element & 6th Sense!
posted December 30, 2004 08:34 PM

Self-Criticism Thread = Self-Help Guide

Shenjairo, I don't think that Svarog meant this Thread to be depressing. If creating your list made you feel that way, then it is all about the way you approached the process. Just think of your list as Constructive Criticism, not Destructive Criticism. In other words, this is supposed to be a Thread of self-criticism, not self-bashing.

In my opinion, seeing people expose themselves to complete strangers & acquaintances as Consis, Shai-Hulud, and many others have done…is empowering! I don't think that anyone in HC would deliberately use information in this Thread against another member; so pointing out your faults to others (with whom you feel secure) can often lead to healing.

When it comes to problems of a serious nature, talking about them can lead to unexpected sources of support & guidance. So, I hope you will take my advice and let us know what it is about yourself that you don't like or seek to improve. Personally, I will see if there is anything that I can do to help you, if you want.

As for me, I have a few reoccurring issues that always seem to cause conflicts in my life, with myself or with others. Some are a part of who I am, and I have learned to live with them. While others, I could do something about, but have not changed so far.

*I always try to help everyone before helping myself.
*I sometimes put the needs of others above the needs of those closest to me.
*I rarely consider being careful or safe and fail to realise that I can actually die.
*I procrastinate badly if I have to do something I do not enjoy.
*I “rip-off” companies by buying new items & then return the old/broken similar items using the receipt from the new stuff.
*I have very ambitious goals & dreams, but cannot find the drive to reach them.
*I am naïve because I expect the best from everyone.
*I have lots of skills but lack the experience to “back them up”.

I believe that we can all be one big “Support Group” for each other if we really want to be, like in RealDeal’s Being Overweight Thread. It is very important to be at peace with who you are, as that will then allow you to change who you are, as Consis said earlier. This is doubly important with disasters like the one in South-East Asia, as we are reminded of the fragility of Life and the speed with which it can end.

In order to change who you are, you must act differently! Your actions determine who you are, not your thoughts. Some people say: “Nobody knows the real me!” The truth is that they only see what you do! Your actions are a message! You cannot just simply think of changing who you are and expect to be different and expect everyone to see this. You must think of changing, act in accordance with your thoughts, and then you will have changed who you are!

Step #1 – Identify the/your problems.
Step #2 – Come up with solutions to the/your problems.
Step #3 – Implement those solutions.
Step #4 – Adapt to the new situation.

As for me, I think Michael Jackson said it best: “I’m starting with the man in the mirror…I’ll ask if he can change his ways…”
____________
*The end to no beginning...



*Take care, Leo

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Consis
Consis


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
posted December 30, 2004 09:13 PM
Edited By: Consis on 30 Dec 2004

Another Direction Of Thought

Another way to possibly look at this thread is to see it as simply being honest. And not only with the people reading it, but also with yourself. It's one thing to lie to other people but it is much more self-destructive to convince yourself of it as well.

By being honest a person can move forward with a clear mind. What holds us from progress and drags us into pessimism is the inability to sometimes accept who we are. It's a great life-lesson to learn. That's why when you decide to marry someone you promise to love them through sickness and health, for better or worse, till death do you part. It is a promise that you make not only with your spouse but also with yourself. You are offering your true self while accepting the other person for who they are, both the good and the bad side of them. That's the thing about all people. No one is perfect. Everyone has flaws. To ignore this is to invite a false sense of reality. How can you be at your best if you don't understand your own personal obstacles?

This is the ultimate goal of being human. To find and know your limits and then to exceed them. This is how we have come so far as people. Many find themselves wallowing in self pity, but many more have identified their own faults and set out to eliminate or conquer them.

Personally speaking, this is how I've come to some small amount of peace with myself. I know my faults and now I work to conquer them. But once again, how could I grow from this if I don't even know what's wrong with me? Honesty first, then hard work and determination, then help others who struggle like you once did. That's the way to go if you were to ask me.
____________
Roses Are RedAnd So Am I

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pandora
pandora


Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
posted December 30, 2004 09:37 PM

I think this is an awesome thread! I don't really think that its depressing either, but maybe more of an awakening for some people if they take the time to truly look within themselves to examine what their faults might be.

I think I know my faults pretty well - the biggest fault that I have is that I'm fairly obsessive about most things that I get involved with. Some have mentioned that they start things and don't finish them - I'm the opposite entirely, when i star something I must finish it. And when I say this, I mean it in the most extreme way. An example would be a while back i noticed that I was transferring a lot more data through my PC than usual, so I started watching this a while and realized that I did in fact have a problem.  Now the computer was running fine, but it really picked at me to see that something wasn't exactly right - so i started to hunt for trojans, spyware - you name it. I went though about 10 different PC self help forums - tried a few antivirus programs blah blah blah, next thing you know its 6 am (i started at about 10 pm) and I've now decided that since I cannot find the trojan I must format my PC - so i do that. Then I feel badly that if I go to sleep now, no one will have the games they like to play - so i stay awake and do not take a break until the PC is in exactly the shape it was before I noticed the data transfer (but now the transfer problem is resolved)

I find that I just can't let things go. Another example would be my asking my husband to do the dishes, and he says sure - right after his movie is done. Well I wanted the dishes done now. I try to ignore it, and wait till the movie is done, but in my mind with every passing second the pile of dishes grows and becomes more menacing - until the point where the pile of dishes becomes all that I see and I am completely suffocated by them, and then I have to go do it myself. (this process takes about 3 minutes)

I know that this is a problem I have, and I have tried and tried to get over it - but by now at 31 years old, I've just come to accept that its just me.

Another big one (and this came to me courtesy of my mom, thanks freud for explaining that ) is that I take everything personally. I know i do, but the problem really is that i don't realize it until after I've reacted poorly to a situation. i think it ties into the first fault, in that I am so adamant that everything must be fixed - that if anyone around me has a problem I manage to turn it into something that is my fault because I was unable to fix it. This has nearly pushed my husband to the brink of insanity so many times... lol

Its easier to manage these things on HC tho - because i put myself on a 7 minute delay (a la Don Cherry ) before I reply to anything that I've taken personally. Then I reread it, and make sure I'm looking at it the right way before I actually reply.

The first fault, about being horribly anal affects me here all the time tho. Poor Valeriy When I can't fix it, I have to call him hehe

I have sooooooooo many more faults, but rather than write a novel perhaps I will return again later


____________
"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."

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Leo_Lion
Leo_Lion


Honorable
Supreme Hero
The 5th Element & 6th Sense!
posted December 30, 2004 11:45 PM
Edited By: Leo_Lion on 30 Dec 2004

Thanks for your side of it, Pandora.

Quote:
...if anyone around me has a problem I manage to turn it into something that is my fault because I was unable to fix it. This has nearly pushed my husband to the brink of insanity so many times... lol
I hope you have told your husband that you are aware that you do this. As a husband myself, I can tell you that simply hearing my wife say: "I know that I can be mean/b!tchy/emotional/crazy sometimes and I'm sorry, so thanks for not getting mad at me." is as good as gold for me! So, the next time the she goes bananas on me, I tell myself "This is just a 'tantrum', it will pass, and she will realise this eventually." and it usually works out. I basically let her get it all off her chest in one shot, by not fighting back.

+Off topic+ Gentlemen, in most circumstances women don't really care if you understand what they are saying or not, they simply want someone to listen to them. Just remember the magic words: "Yes dear...yes dear...yes dear"! *Continuously nod head*

Quote:
Its easier to manage these things on HC tho - because i put myself on a 7 minute delay (a la Don Cherry)
Is his tv delay really that long??? I guess there's no real way of telling either, since he hasn't done "Coach's Corner" due to the NHL Lockout. Did you hear that the League set January 14 as the deadline for cancelling the season? Whoa is me!!!

Quote:
I have sooooooooo many more faults, but rather than write a novel perhaps I will return again later.
Well, judging by your obsessive behavior, I would wager that you'll be back before you can get to those dishes on the counter.

P.S. I am sorry if anything in this Post has offended you. I was just joking and am now just being politicaly correct. (i.e. covering my butt)
____________
*The end to no beginning...



*Take care, Leo

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guitarguy
guitarguy


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Rockoon.
posted January 03, 2005 08:46 AM

My flaws:

1. Somewhat introverted
2. Easily embarrassed
3. Fearful of entering possibly embarrassing situations
4. Turning 19 in July; lacks effective sex appeal
5. Little clumsy
6. Somewhat slow, but just a little bit (bad enough)
7. Wishes self was more talented
8. Runs out of subject matter too often
9. Too lazy
10. Could be a whole lot more responsible
11. Doesn't always learn from past mistakes
12. Terrible at math and counting change
13. 18yo yet unemployed
14. 18yo yet no car/driver's license
15. Stays up too late
16. Fear of getting sick/undercooked food
17. Somewhat scared of being alone in the dark
18a. Can't change his own guitar strings
18b. Can't write very good lyrics
18c. Needs to practice singing into a mic
19. Too self-conscious
21. Harbors thoughts and feelings way too long
22. Distraught w/o a girlfriend
23. Flaw #20 to the thousandth power

That was a stretch to cough up, but there you have it.
-guitarguy

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Aculias
Aculias


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
Pretty Boy Angel Sacraficer
posted January 03, 2005 09:48 AM

Flaws well it seems some can be picked up during change & time.

I guess first flaw is I am too nice.
I make my home thier home, I spend too much money on anyone,I buy them anythang & do anythang for them.
I am an easy listener & also I get used alot over being too nice even tho I am not stupid.
I hate to look at a persons eyes when i tell them somethang they dont want to hear even if i am right.

I find myself wanting to help people when they are in trouble & i am usually hruting myself as well because i am not that rich & I know only some much advice, but people still like to hear my wisdom since & been through alot.

I used to be way over confident but my last 3 GF XXX ripped my confidence right away from me.
I have a hard time openeing up to women because Shyness overwealms me & i need to gain my confidence back somehow.

I believe that you should be who you are.
I am humourous & I dont believe I should act mature because it makes you older or more formal etc.
I go to a nice place i dont have to dress nice if i dont want too.
I feel that you should be who you are & not what people expect you to be to be a grown up.

I act imature sometimes but heh I pay my rent & my bills, I pay for the resturaunts & I can act how i want to because i am not disrespecting no one.

I have a really bad weakness for women.
I let them run all over me, many takes advantage of me because i am too nice & understanding.
Trusting also.
I try to be honest & trusting since I used to lie bad when i was a kid.
I guess sometimes I got to be firm with women once in awhile or maybe meet the right one lol.

I let people treat me like dirt & take it so they feel better, even tho it makes me feel like crap.

Mostly with people I care about.
Other people i will get right in thier face no problem lol.

Basically I guess i am your all around nice giving guy who takes alot & gives alot too.
I guess when you been through alot like me you can take alot.


____________
Dreaming of a Better World

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Leo_Lion
Leo_Lion


Honorable
Supreme Hero
The 5th Element & 6th Sense!
posted January 03, 2005 07:10 PM

Ahh...Guitarguy?

I don't see a #20 in your list...

Good Self-Criticism otherwise.
____________
*The end to no beginning...



*Take care, Leo

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guitarguy
guitarguy


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Rockoon.
posted January 04, 2005 04:31 AM

I removed it because I didn't like how I put it. I've decided to replace it with something else I wrote, as the phrase fits me better at that magnitude:

*Wants a girlfriend bad!

There.
-guitarguy
____________

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pandora
pandora


Honorable
Legendary Hero
The Chosen One
posted January 07, 2005 05:30 AM
Edited By: pandora on 6 Jan 2005

Quote:
+Off topic+ Gentlemen, in most circumstances women don't really care if you understand what they are saying or not, they simply want someone to listen to them. Just remember the magic words: "Yes dear...yes dear...yes dear"! *Continuously nod head*


Ohhhh Leo... you may well have sent some poor unsuspecting men to their deaths with this one!

I can only speak for me here, but if I'm mad already and I feel like I am being patronized - I will take the rage to a whole new level "yes dear"... lol, my husband would never dare!

As for Don Cherry, no - the delay is only 7 seconds but 7 seconds isn't quite long enough for me

Quote:
Well, judging by your obsessive behavior, I would wager that you'll be back before you can get to those dishes on the counter.


Ha ha ha ha! You think you're soooooo smart doncha? Well I didn't reply right away, now did I? and yes it was intensely difficult and yes it was purely to spite you - but still you were wrong so na-na-na-na-boo-boo to you. hehe  [/childishness]

So here's another fault then  Like most women, I never forget - ever, I can remember conversations from my teens word for word. That in itself isn't so very bad, but lets couple it with another fault - I hold grudges. I hold grudges bigtime, so for people that are just getting to know me now its no biggie - but for the people i've known for many years it can really really suck.

Like say for example a buddy of mine wants to borrow something of mine, and I'm reluctant to let him - my husband can say "well he hasreturned everything he's borrowed from us lately. But I'd have to reply "Yeaaa... but... remember in 1995 when he borrowed that pen? I didn't get that pen back"

However I am pretty good with this one, because I know I'm being stupid. I have that part of my brain that will stop my mouth before it shoots off something irrational - and most of the time I listen to it

So thats that for today lol  

ps Leo, just about the only way you're going to offend me is by being PC lol


to Aculias : the things you are describing aren't really your faults - they're the faults of the people who take your kindness for granted. heck, it may not even be the right word to call it a fault, its more like its their loss - don't apologize for who you are

____________
"In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."

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darksparkle
darksparkle


Hired Hero
Quote the raven,
posted January 07, 2005 06:06 AM

i have a horribly short fuse

i tend to kick ppl that piss me off (like today, i almost broke this dude's glasses oops...)

i need to learn how to stop being so hyper

i need to learn to speak my mind even more than i already do cause i suffer if i dont (even though i get in trouble for that)

i am horribly unathletic

i have to be nicer to my lil bro

the list goes on and on, but ill let u off the hook

~RAivyn~
____________
Why does death have to be such a likely answer?

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terje_the_ma...
terje_the_mad_wizard


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Disciple of Herodotus
posted January 10, 2005 09:39 PM

I am too shy.
I am too lazy
I don't work on my university studies, and I still get As. Which ruins my will to improve on my laziness...
I spend too much time on the computer without actually doing anything.
I never finish things I start writing.
I am hopeless when it comes to girls. I think they think I'm a fag or something.
I don't have more than 2 friends.
I am hopeless at getting new friends.
I have a social intelligence of -84.5
My ability to learn facts fast makes me overconfident in my own intellect.
I try to use a language that's way to pretentious for me.
I never learned to play the guitar.
I yell at my dog, and won't take him for walks if it's raining.
I spend too much time at internet forums.
I can't cook.
I don't eat food.
I have a disease no one knows what is.
I'm a cynical bastard.
I rarely laugh.
I rarely lets anything affect me emotionally.
I don't drink enough.
I spend too much money.

But I still think life is great
____________
"Sometimes I think everyone's just pretending to be brave, and none of us really are. Maybe pretending to be brave is how you get brave, I don't know."
- Grenn, A Storm of Swords.

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guitarguy
guitarguy


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Rockoon.
posted January 11, 2005 01:05 AM

Quote:
I don't drink enough.


Yeah, I should drink less soda and drink more water.

Quote:
I never learned to play the guitar.


If you have at least half your life ahead of you, as well as $300 or so, then you're set to get rid of this common sin.

-guitarguy
____________

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Leo_Lion
Leo_Lion


Honorable
Supreme Hero
The 5th Element & 6th Sense!
posted January 11, 2005 01:53 AM
Edited By: Leo_Lion on 10 Jan 2005

A few jabs and then another flaw!

Quote:
Just remember the magic words: "Yes dear...yes dear...yes dear"! *Continuously nod head*
Pandora said:I can only speak for me here, but if I'm mad already and I feel like I am being patronized - I will take the rage to a whole new level "yes dear"...
Ahh, you see Pandora & all you relationship-disabled gentlemen out there (looking towards Terje, guitarguy, etc. ), the trick is to be convincing with your "Yes dear"s. Always spice them up to seem different (Of course dear...Sure dear...Sorry dear...Yes dear, etc.) or look her in the eyes when you say it to make it sound sincere. At all costs avoid doing it in a patronizing way...even as a joke! It will let her on to your scheme.

Quote:
I didn't reply right away, now did I? and yes it was intensely difficult and yes it was purely to spite you - but still you were wrong so na-na-na-na-boo-boo to you. hehe  [/childishness]
I was going to say: "Oh Yeah! Well, Pandora, I bet my big brother an beat up your big brother!" But instead, I will say: "Of course Pandora...Sure Pandora...Sorry Pandora...Yes Pandora."

As for another flaw I discovered about myself:

*I often say too much and put my foot in my mouth.
____________
*The end to no beginning...



*Take care, Leo

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Consis
Consis


Honorable
Legendary Hero
Of Ruby
posted January 11, 2005 02:18 AM

Terje_the_mad_wizard wrote:

Quote:
I don't have more than 2 friends.
I am hopeless at getting new friends.

Make it 3 with me as the newest.
____________
Roses Are RedAnd So Am I

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Svarog
Svarog


Honorable
Supreme Hero
statue-loving necrophiliac
posted January 11, 2005 02:20 AM

Quote:
I don't eat food.

Cant help but wonder what do you eat?
and...
Quote:
I have a disease no one knows what is.

Symptoms?

____________
The meek shall inherit the earth, but NOT its mineral rights.

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terje_the_ma...
terje_the_mad_wizard


Responsible
Supreme Hero
Disciple of Herodotus
posted January 11, 2005 09:35 AM

Quote:
Quote:
I don't eat food.

Cant help but wonder what do you eat?

lol. I mean't that I'm very oicky on what I do eat. Could have made that more clear

Quote:
Quote:
I have a disease no one knows what is.

Symptoms?


Red dots on my legs. Weird digestion. Too much billirubin in the blood.

for the thread, Svarog! Always nice to rant a bit about oneself
____________
"Sometimes I think everyone's just pretending to be brave, and none of us really are. Maybe pretending to be brave is how you get brave, I don't know."
- Grenn, A Storm of Swords.

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