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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 22, 2009 12:29 AM |
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Quote: With an attitude like that, no wonder they fail so often!
Oh really? Mvass... you silly little boy. Then perhaps you're not as much silly as you're simply naive? I guess the latter since you know... you wouldn't want to do anything since it's all pointless right?
So you think everything is completely rational? Human beings are 100% predictable creatures with nothing more to them than the actions that "logical behaviour" dictate? Well the kind of people I know have a spark which is something pretty neat. Not that you would understand but I still think I can tell you about it you should be able to picture it since you seem to be pretty good at seeing stuff in your head.
Here's the thing mvass... I never said that relationships aren't about being rational with each other. I'm a very big fan of rational thought myself (hard to believe I know!) but that doesn't change the fact that we're still beings with soul (well atleast most of us), it's what makes us human afterall. And it's that "Fingerspitzengefühl" (ehm... basically describes a special feeling for being delicate) you'll only learn by doing. A relationship will ultimately fail if the partners don't have a feel for each other and you do not get that feel for the other only by being rational. It's just experience and getting to know each other.
And experience is nothing you get by just sitting there and having it all planned out in your head thinking you don't need it since you think you know. Going out living and trying things isn't a sign that you're not able to grasp the result before hand by thinking about them, it just shows that you're brave enough to try. In the end you'll either find out that you were right or (surprise surprise) that there is actually more to it than you thought and you'll have learned something.
Do you know Platons "Allegory of the Cave". I bet a guy like you has read that before... now in this particular case your a total caveman.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 12:47 AM |
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Quote: Human beings are 100% predictable creatures with nothing more to them than the actions that "logical behaviour" dictate?
No, I know better than that. Human beings aren't always rational. But the more rational one is, the better one's life is. If relationships are based on a rational basis, they are more likely to succeed. I know that if I don't find someone favourable rationally, I won't pursue a romantic relationship emotionally with them, either.
I understand what you're saying about having a feel for each other, but that feel will only come if the relationship is on a rational basis already. Here's how one does it. Do we have numerous common interests? Do we react to things in a similar manner? Do we enjoy talking to each other? If the answers tend to be "yes", then go for it, and the feeling should develop.
Quote: Going out living and trying things isn't a sign that you're not able to grasp the result before hand by thinking about them, it just shows that you're brave enough to try.
I guess I'm just too much of a coward for heroin.
And remember, I was in a relationship, so I know what I'm talking about.
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Eccentric Opinion
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 01:57 AM |
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Dude, you were in a relationship for what? A few weeks? You don't know what you're talking about at all. Be in a relationship for a few months then yeah, people might take what you say with more merit.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 22, 2009 02:00 AM |
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"I was in a relationship, so I know what I'm talking about"
You're adorable^^. Oh and if you think about what you say you'd come to find that you'll never get out of that cave.
I'll reply to the rest a bit later but I just had to say that.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 02:16 AM |
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william:
At least I know when to get out. Someone less rational would have stayed.
Az:
Say what you will, but I'm not the one in the cave.
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Eccentric Opinion
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TheDeath
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
with serious business
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posted November 22, 2009 02:24 AM |
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Quote: And experience is nothing you get by just sitting there and having it all planned out in your head thinking you don't need it since you think you know. Going out living and trying things isn't a sign that you're not able to grasp the result before hand by thinking about them, it just shows that you're brave enough to try. In the end you'll either find out that you were right or (surprise surprise) that there is actually more to it than you thought and you'll have learned something.
Do you know Platons "Allegory of the Cave". I bet a guy like you has read that before... now in this particular case your a total caveman.
I know this was addressed to mvass but to add my 2 cents to this. I am definitely not a caveman in that allegory and neither "a frivolous explorer". Especially when you have statistics (i.e observations) that you know beforehand. If you are wise you arm yourself with that knowledge instead of ignorance like "man, I'm different, definitely gonna be different for ME", and THEN go and pursue that relationship with that in mind, that would be the wisest choice.
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The above post is subject to SIRIOUSness.
No jokes were harmed during the making of this signature.
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 02:40 AM |
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Quote: At least I know when to get out. Someone less rational would have stayed.
That wasn't my point and you only got out because you were unhappy. Anybody else would have done the same.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 22, 2009 02:42 AM |
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Quote: Say what you will, but I'm not the one in the cave
Read the Analogy again and as rational as you are, I'm sure you will see that your attitude isn't one that would get a caveman out of the cave, would it? No.
And now toooooo beeeeeeeeeeed~~~~~~
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 02:54 AM |
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william:
I've also seen a number of relationships, both successful and unsuccessful. And I can identify the trends.
Az:
Quote: Read the Analogy again and as rational as you are, I'm sure you will see that your attitude isn't one that would get a caveman out of the cave, would it?
I'm already out of the cave, it's you who has it. You subscribe to the view of relationships that society in general has, and wave aside any criticism of the popular view.
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Eccentric Opinion
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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 22, 2009 03:19 AM |
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Hmm... seems like you didn't understand it afterall.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 08:26 AM |
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Quote: I've also seen a number of relationships, both successful and unsuccessful. And I can identify the trends.
So? My point weas that you don't know what you're talking about at all. Neither does TheDeath (and I don't even know wtf he's posting in this thread cos he has no experience whatsoever). I've seen sucessful and unsuccessful relationships as well. Your point is what exactly?
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 08:29 AM |
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 08:30 AM |
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You don't at all. I guess you're basing this off you're extremely long and successful relationship? Yeah, right, good one mate.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 08:41 AM |
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I'm basing this on other people's long and successful relationships, and on where other relationships go wrong. As well as on my own, of course.
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Eccentric Opinion
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 08:43 AM |
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Alright, I just think people would take more seriously what you would say if you just had a bit more experience with your own relationships and not looking at others. You know?
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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mvassilev
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 08:59 AM |
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Well, William, I don't see you in a successful relationship. And your general advice won't lead anyone to one, either.
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Eccentric Opinion
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 22, 2009 09:07 AM |
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Edited by william at 09:09, 22 Nov 2009.
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I was in one for a few months, actually. So in this case, I kinda know a bit more what I'm talking about than yourself. Although, in the end it doesn't matter too much. Being in some unsuccessful relationships, imo, is a good thing. Learn from the mistakes and the next relationship might turn out better because you know what to do and what not to do.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Elvin
Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Endless Revival
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posted November 22, 2009 09:40 AM |
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Mvass.. Until you get no expert eagle eye you don't convince me that you can learn all there is about relationships by observing your immediate environment.
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H5 is still alive and kicking, join us in the Duel Map discord server!
Map also hosted on Moddb
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 10:06 AM |
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Will, am I any more entitled to say my opinion than you because my relationship (longest) lasted almost two years? Nope. And so is mvass, even though his lasted a few weeks. Once you get a grasp, it doesn't matter how long it takes - you do know what relationship is about.
It's worse for Death, who afaik told us he never had any - but mvass had some practice.
Ultimately it can't come to numbers, much like an experiment, some need 200 hours to draw a conclusion, some need just an hour and they are done and will learn nothing new. It's more about how fast do we learn and what do we WANT to learn from a relationship.
Even though I don't agree on his view of age importance in relationship (I think the opposite - it tastes best when you are young ), I certainly wouldn't try to shut him up "because I have more experience"
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JollyJoker
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
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posted November 22, 2009 10:56 AM |
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Carcity, Azagal is right, that's all there is to say to it. It can't be wrong to express your feelings and see what comes out of it. I don't know why this perspective of eternity always have to come in. The truth is, every relationship will help you, no matter the duration, and if you don't make your experiences now you'll make them later, but of course your expectations will be higher.
So, just do what you feel like doing.
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