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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 02, 2009 01:49 PM |
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Don't misunderstand me I'm not the bitter old man that is Doomforge. To me anniversaries were something special as well and I'd celebrate the big ones or do something small but nice for the "normal" ones. It's not melodramatic to give it some thought but I find it kinda melodramatic to for example buy her 30 roses for every day of the first month or something like that. As long as you don't overdo it and give the thing more importance than it actually deserves it's all good.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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emilsn
Legendary Hero
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posted November 02, 2009 03:45 PM |
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Good we agree then.. I believe
I actully bought my GF 5 roses when we hit 5month day just for the fun of it and we actully didn't do that much on our 6six month day
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Don't walk behind me; I may not
lead. Don't walk in front of me;
I may not follow. Just walk
beside me and be my friend.
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Doomforge
Admirable
Undefeatable Hero
Retired Hero
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posted November 02, 2009 05:18 PM |
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Quote: I still dont get what people have against month days!
Because it's stupid. Do you need an anniversary to show someone you care for him/her? Shouldn't you do it every day? Especially to someone you pretty much barely know (few months just isn't enough) and aren't really that bonded with yet.
It's teen pop melodrama, that's what it is.
The bitter old man has spoken
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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Azagal
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Smooth Snake
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posted November 02, 2009 06:01 PM |
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Edited by Azagal at 18:03, 02 Nov 2009.
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Quote: Especially to someone you pretty much barely know (few months just isn't enough)
I wouldn't say that "a few months" qualify as "barely" knowing someone. Especially considering that you normally don't start a relationship from the point where you first meet the other one. And considering that once you're in a relationship (atleast if it's a serious one) you already know somethings about the other since you base your decision on starting the relationship on info (as I said if it's serious if not some other parts may play a bigger role).
And then once you start a relationship you spend more time together so you're bound to find out more about each other, so a few months certainly isn't "barely" if you ask me.
You certainly don't need an anniversary to let someone know that you think he/she/it is special but then again you don't need a birthday party, presents, cards, well wishes, etc. on your birthday in order to find out people care for you. But they still do it because it's a sweet and nice gesture. As I said you shouldn't make a big deal out of it but things like half a year or a year are reason enough to put in a little more effort to make the day special. And every other one a sweet gesture is totally acceptable and a nice thing to do if you ask me.
I had a bottle of champagne for my ex when we were together for half a year and she got 12 roses and a bed spread with a big self-drawn heart where I wrote "I love you" (actually it was "Hab dich lieb" which is not quite as strong as "I love you" it's more like "I like you" but with a more romantic connotation of course.) and something else that (while being a totally cool idea) is not something I should mention here xD and she was so happy I can hardly describe it to you. On the other monthly anniversaries I'd just say something sweet or do something nice, anything really. That doesn't mean I'm wasn't being nice to hear, treating her and showing her my affection the rest of the time too. It's not melodrama it's being nice (of course I wouldn't have done it if I wouldn't have known she'd like it but it's like that with other thing you do for others).
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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Doomforge
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posted November 02, 2009 06:07 PM |
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5 months isn't barely, yeah... it's less than barely.
people learn new stuff about each other after 20 years and more. What is 5 months?
It's nothing. For example, I know my best friend for 10 years now and still don't know many things about him. There are also things people just don't want to say and won't say: you need to see them spontaneously, in some situation... only time can make that available.
After 5 months you know what the other person wanted to tell you + his/hers basic behavior. The truth, well, it takes some action, takes some events in life in which you both participate. After lots of those imo is the time you can say "I know him/her well".
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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Azagal
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Smooth Snake
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posted November 02, 2009 06:52 PM |
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Edited by Azagal at 18:57, 02 Nov 2009.
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Well if you think it takes 20 years to get to know someone so be it. I for my part know that I know a lot of people pretty good (as in "really good". I know what makes them them if one can say it like that) and I've not known them for 20 or 10 or 5 years. You're basically saying that an individual is in a relationship with a stranger they have sex with until you pass the 10 year mark? Because according to you I don't know who he/she/it really is. Of course you can still learn new stuff about people after 20 years you can still do that after a lifetime together but that doesn't mean you haven't known who that person is until then, does it now? And if it means anything after almost 2 years with my ex I almost knew her even better than she did. I'm not saying that because I have a huge ego it's just the way it was.
And even if you were right I do not see how you still can't celebrate such little things. It's a nice and sweet gesture that makes the other feel loved and appreciated. What could possibly be melodramatic or wrong with that?
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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Doomforge
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posted November 02, 2009 06:56 PM |
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That you need exactly this pop drama occasion to do so.
And no, you're not having sex with a stranger. You're not having sex with someone you really know well either.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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Azagal
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Smooth Snake
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posted November 02, 2009 07:00 PM |
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Edited by Azagal at 19:06, 02 Nov 2009.
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Whatever it is you do for her on that day isn't something you do because it's your anniversary. You do it because you want to show her your affection for her. That day just usually is a good time to do it. Nothing more or nothing less. I already said that just because you spoil her on that day doesn't mean you don't spoil her the rest of time too. It isn't the day that's the occasion, it's your partner. But enough now I need to make dinner I'm starving
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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william
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
LummoxLewis
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posted November 02, 2009 07:07 PM |
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Lol, I've noticed Doomforge is sorta becoming like TheDeath, kinda pointless trying to talk to him at times because he just won't listen to you. Just try and accept the fact that 5 months for some people is pretty good, Doomforge. You might think it's insignificant but don't ruin peoples mood if they come and post here that they have been together for 5 months. Just say congrats and leave them to it, don't try and stuff up their mood and say it's nothing to be bragging about and that they can brag if they've been together for 20 years or something (wtf?!).
Anyway, I pretty much agree with Azagal here. Just try to be a bit more understanding, Doomforge.
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~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Doomforge
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posted November 02, 2009 07:18 PM |
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I see no point of congratulating for such a trivial "achievement", sorry if it sounds harsh. (don't worry Emil, I'm still wishing you best luck ) And no, I'm not being Death here: but seriously, that's what I believe in. That you can't know people after such a short time well & also that you can't really love them after that time (you can only feel fascination which should fade away gradually - that would explain why so many marriages simply FAIL so fast - people mistake fascination for love and after it fades, it leaves nothing, which ends up with a divorce or failed marriage).
I never said any of you have to agree with me or even acknowledge my posts. If you don't like them, ignore them altogether. Also, you can't be understanding when talking about concepts ; seriously, understanding about what, other people's definitions? Why I an understanding. I just don't like those and don't agree with them.
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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JoonasTo
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What if Elvin was female?
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posted November 02, 2009 07:20 PM |
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DF, you are way too melodramatic. It's a little sign of affection and truth be told, women are suckers for such things. We all know even if it doesn't mean a thing to us it has a huge effect on them just like saying I love you every day. Means nothing to us but don't say it for a week and they'll sulk for a month while you wonder what you have done wrong this time.
Ps. Are you depressed or something? You sound a lot like me and I think I'm possibly depressed.
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Doomforge
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posted November 02, 2009 07:24 PM |
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I was depressed when I was 18. Right now I have my emotions well under control
I don't mind showing affection (in private, ofc), I even like it. It's not that I'm some kind of a guy that never ever shows any signs of it. I just don't like the trivialization of one of the most powerful & astonishing feeling people are capable of (love), making it some kind of teen's whim, you love that girl today, other in a next month, and oh whoopsie our relationship failed after a year, ok, next girl to be loved. Seriously, don't you think that "I love you" sounds lame and pathetic if repeated for the 20th time and each time to a different person?
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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TheDeath
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
with serious business
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posted November 02, 2009 07:36 PM |
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Quote: Lol, I've noticed Doomforge is sorta becoming like TheDeath, kinda pointless trying to talk to him at times because he just won't listen to you.
Just because people disagree with you and post stuff other than "congrats" doesn't mean they don't listen, actually it's exactly the OTHER way around.
I felt the need to reply since you mentioned me
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The above post is subject to SIRIOUSness.
No jokes were harmed during the making of this signature.
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william
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LummoxLewis
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posted November 02, 2009 07:39 PM |
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Lol I figured you would reply, it is you after all.
But that's not what I meant.
____________
~Ticking away the moments that
make up a dull day, Fritter and
waste the hours in an off-hand
way~
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Azagal
Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Smooth Snake
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posted November 02, 2009 08:23 PM |
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@Doomforge
Yeah "I love you" should not be overused. That's why it was "I like you" in a more romantic way. English doesn't have the right vocabulary to translate it properly. At least not that I know off.
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"All I can see is what's in front of me. And all I can do is keep moving forward" - The Heir Wielder of Names, Seeker of Thrones, King of Swords, Breaker of Infinities, Wheel Smashing Lord
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emilsn
Legendary Hero
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posted November 02, 2009 08:56 PM |
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Just put in really - I really like you - or I like you very much.. makes it stronger
I still like having a day and in 3 months I have been with my GF for a year
____________
Don't walk behind me; I may not
lead. Don't walk in front of me;
I may not follow. Just walk
beside me and be my friend.
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JoonasTo
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
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posted November 02, 2009 09:30 PM |
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Yes, it is stupid. But it doesn't matter what you think or what I think. What matters is what they think. You should know that by now.
Yeah, but I shouldn't be talking. After all. I'm the one who's emotionally retarded. And whose got his life the most messed up, especially when it comes to women.
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DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.
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DagothGares
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No gods or kings
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posted November 02, 2009 09:36 PM |
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Believe me, I'm the biggest loser here
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If you have any more questions, go to Dagoth Cares.
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Doomforge
Admirable
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Retired Hero
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posted November 02, 2009 10:18 PM |
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Depends on the criteria.
If it's result/effort ratio, I can't believe someone can beat me in failing.
But hey, it's not kindergarten. We're not going to contend for who has the biggest cock is the biggest loser around here
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We reached to the stars and everything is now ours
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emilsn
Legendary Hero
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posted November 02, 2009 10:53 PM |
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Why would we?
We all know I lose, at the loser thing and the cock thing - Bullocks!
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Don't walk behind me; I may not
lead. Don't walk in front of me;
I may not follow. Just walk
beside me and be my friend.
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