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Heroes Community > Tavern of the Rising Sun > Thread: Hating life itself.
Thread: Hating life itself. This thread is 3 pages long: 1 2 3 · NEXT»
VokialBG
VokialBG


Honorable
Legendary Hero
First in line
posted December 24, 2014 06:33 PM

Hating life itself.

Exams... studying... university... this was all my life. Now its over. I'm done. No more exams, no move heavy books, no more university and studying (I even got that excellent marks). My hole live ended.

I have nothing to do on this world now. I have no friends (I had no time for them, and now I'm not young enough to find them), I studied something I hate. I'll have to work something pretty boring and... I hate it. Its all over. And all this holidays... they are so so so boring... nothing to do at all. When working and studying, even if I hate it, there is at least something to do to occupy my mind. Now I have nothing at all. I see people on my age or even a bit younger who achieved much more by doing something they simply like. I achieved nothing and I payed much more. I worked harder then all I know, just for I hate this. When you hate something you have to work harder to achieve something much smaller.

and here am I. At the edge of nothing. What am I to do now? There is no exit. I cant start again from nothing. I want to die and be reborn. Why there is no second life in life, like in the video games.

Think before doing something. It may ruin your life.

I'm trying to find a solution. But I can't. So... I'll try to find it by asking someone else. I expect hate, lack of understanding and mockery. It's what I deserve and... HC is not a mental hospital, right? But I still can try. There is no reason in my life and I cant find something to call "a goal" in it. All left before me... is to... somehow... wait for my... retirement?

I really have nothing to do on this world.
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artu
artu


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
My BS sensor is tingling again
posted December 24, 2014 06:43 PM

If you recently graduated, you are still way too young to claim it's too late to start over. If you hate your major, find something else, it's indeed depressing to spend life on something you dont even like, let alone love. Millions of people go in another direction after they are done with school. There are architects who are sax players, doctors who are business men, economists riding planes... Break the circle, it's easier than it looks around your age.
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Are you pretty? This is my occasion. - Ghost

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Salamandre
Salamandre


Admirable
Omnipresent Hero
Wog refugee
posted December 24, 2014 07:03 PM

When I was 14 my sleep mechanics got destroyed somehow. My parents were too busy with their irresponsible occupations and did not care. 25 years later, when I can sleep more than 2 hours it is a great day, maybe once every 6 months. My good nights are my best souvenirs, I recall each one.

If you don't have a constant head ache, every day, from morning to night, over and over, then sir, you are ready for life and in full health. What you do with it depends only on you. Because life needs temporary disconnections, and when you can't fall asleep, you are permanently connected and the damage sustained from reality is terrible.

But then there is people who are paralyzed.

Or ugly, or born in Africa and damned to live a really snowy life.

Then there is Herry.

And then I say I am lucky.
____________
Era II mods and utilities

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Valeriy
Valeriy

Mage of the Land
Naughty, Naughty Valeriy
posted December 24, 2014 07:47 PM

Hey Vokial,

Sorry to hear about your situation, but I don't think this is anything to be ashamed about.

Most people have some very dark and hopeless patches in their life. I know I did, and I know others who did. From what I've experienced and seen it often has to do with the person's place in the world - either what they want to do VS what they "should" do, or not liking anything and not even knowing what it is that they want to do.

Often people are ashamed about having such difficulties and are afraid to speak about it, and this creates the impression that there are less people having this type of experience than there actually are. But asking for ideas like you're doing is a very good idea. Nobody else has the answer, only you do, but people's ideas and perspective can often help to point us in a new direction.

I want to ask, do you know what it is that you want to do instead of the path you've pursued so far? In other words, are you having difficulty with finding what it is that you want to do, or is the difficulty that what you want to do seems impossible?
____________
You can wait for others to do it, but if they don't know how, you'll wait forever.
Be an example of what you want to see on HC and in the world.
http://www.heroesofmightandmagic.com

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NoobX
NoobX


Undefeatable Hero
Now, this is a paradox...
posted December 24, 2014 07:54 PM

^ that's a good boss, right there
____________
Ghost said:
Door knob resembles anus tap.

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mvassilev
mvassilev


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
posted December 24, 2014 09:58 PM

I majored in economics and am now doing software development. You don't have to get a job in the field of your major, and shouldn't, if you hate it.
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Eccentric Opinion

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VokialBG
VokialBG


Honorable
Legendary Hero
First in line
posted December 24, 2014 10:16 PM
Edited by VokialBG at 23:18, 24 Dec 2014.

When I still was in school my most dearest wish was one day to find something that I really, really like and dedicate my whole life to it and to love it, love it as nothing on this world. And I was in love in this idea itself. There were many things I wanted to do. But mostly I wanted the be historian. History teacher, archaeologist, lecturer, curator in museum. Whatever. I loved history and I wanted to dedicate my life to it. And I was actually good in it. I even got few rewards. So when I was 18-19 and the time to choose what to do after school came, I wanted to study history or archaeology at the university. But my parents told me that teachers, archaeologists and etc. are not well paid. I insisted to study what I wanted and the war between me and them started. Using all type of psychological weapons (laugh at me, calling to relatives to tell me why studying history is so foolish and how all are going to laugh at me later, not letting me out if I not promise them to become a law student and etc., and etc.)... they won.

Anyway. I went to the university and for almost 6 years I was a law student. And I got almost only excellent marks. My hope at first was that one day I may start to like it. But this never happened. I still detest it. Studying something I never liked was very painful and hard. It was incredibly dull, so this forced me to try harder and harder. I lost almost all my friends, for I wasn't able to go out a lot. I never visited noisy places like bars, night clubs, etc. I was and still am social invalid. I lost all my social habits. Today I cant even talk to a person normally, I cant keep a conversations. Whatever. I was like in a coma for 6 long years. The only person near me was my girlfriend.

You'll maybe ask how I did this, when I never liked it? It was hard but not impossible for me. My parents are not rich, and seeing how they spend a lot for me made me do it. Also I was feeling this as some duty... Maybe I was born to be soldier, who knows?

Because I hated and still hate law so much, and history was closed page for me, after few years I tried to do something I like in the my free time. I like to read fiction. So I started a blog... you know, that kind of blogs where you describe all books you read, and I also started to write short stories, also I translated a whole book from XIX century and made huge critical research for it. This took me 2,5 years. This translation is still not printed. Finding publisher is almost impossible here. Anyway I'm still trying but the editors seem not be very interested and satisfied with my work. And almost no one read the blog. I got only few finished short stories and I got rewarded for one, but... I was never really effective as writer. I cant write enough, because I'm always in depression. And some people are tell me that I have some talents it this since I was a kid. But studying, thinking and practising law is making me sad and nervous and when you feel like this, you cant do art. Not to miss that you cant be a real writer here. You'll never earn enough.

I'm still young person. Its true. I just graduated. But... I'm older enough to know that my life ended. I cant start studying something else. If I do so I'll get around 30 before finishing it and thats a lot... most people on 30 have families, houses, stable work position and etc... and If I start something absolutely new on 30 I'll still be at the university... Also I dont have the same energy any more. Law drained it all. I just cant study again with the same self-destructive desire. I just cant study something that seriously and I'll have to if I start from the beginning.

On other side I cant do nothing with that law. Nothing except practising it.

Yes, there are many on this world that are in much worse situations, as Sal said, but everyone has his own hell, and mine is that one. And I'm not happy with it.

I want to have many friends, I want to do crazy stuff, that people usually do when they are 19, but I'm to old for this now. All I know on my age are not doing stuff like that any more. So I just missed that time and I feel bad for this. Can actually some of you beliеve  that I was sober all my life? Yes, exactly, I was never ever drunk

Also I missed so much that sometimes I feel like I want to be everything... I want to be rich and poor, sad and happy, king and pauper, man and women, great lover and clumsy idiot, policeman and criminal.

When I told this to my girlfriend, she told me that I must try in the acting school, but I cant do it... I can not speak with people other then her as I told you here, how can I go on stage?! I'll be terrible actor, they will not even except me. They hardly except people with actual talent.

So... I feel vary sad. And I feel like I have nothing to do. I need some goal to achieve. My ex-friends, who almost all already dont even remember me, and other that actually do remember, have their own houses, cars, work, wifes or fiancees now and most of them feel happy with what they do.

And I have law diploma, one never published translated novel, few short stories, around 150 euro (300 leva) and depression... ah and lots of books. I literally own only this. I want to entirely change my whole life, but I dont see any way to do so.

I have no idea what to do now... I feel like 70 years old gradpa and very tired from everything.

Maybe some of you know about this novel. Its the story of my life by Balzak. Its absolutely the same.
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Geny
Geny


Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
What if Elvin was female?
posted December 24, 2014 10:39 PM

There are 2 things I have to say to you, Vok. First of all, stop comparing yourself to other people. You wanted to be a snowing historian! You, sir, are not a regular sort of fellow so don't compare yourself to them and follow your own road, especially since you already know where the regular road leads you.
Secondly, studying is indeed hell, but in Israel people go through two consecutive hells: second is the studying, the first one is the army. Three years in the army drain a LOT out of you. So we have a local tradition, when people finish their service they grab a couple of friends and go abroad. Some to Europe, many to the US and a lot to the Far East or South America. Many of them disappear for months. They come back completely rejuvenated (and usually high as hell). Point is, you my friend need to unwind. Take some time off with your lady, shut yourself away from the world for a week, clear your head. The path will be much clearer when you get back.

Everyone does things they regret, you just need to overcome the disappointment and try again.
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DON'T BE A NOOB, JOIN A.D.V.E.N.T.U.R.E.

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Galaad
Galaad

Hero of Order
Li mort as morz, li vif as vis
posted December 24, 2014 11:58 PM
Edited by Galaad at 00:15, 25 Dec 2014.

VokialBG said:
When I told this to my girlfriend, she told me that I must try in the acting school, but I cant do it... I can not speak with people other then her as I told you here, how can I go on stage?! I'll be terrible actor, they will not even except me. They hardly except people with actual talent.

I think it takes a lot to open up like this on public forum, even if it's HC, even if behind a CPU, you still expose yourself. This is why I quote the theater part, because that goes in the direction of what is happening when you go on stage. You are naked. As long as you want people to receive your true self. Stanislavski approach. Your girlfriend gave you an excellent advice. I'm a musician and started piano at the age of three. Everytime I had to go on stage, be it for auditions and exams at conservatory, I was trembling with all my body and fearing with all my heart, making fingers slip and miss notes. In society I am very awkward, one of the few times I went to a night club some guy asked me if I was working there. Anyway I should start with the fact I have a big problem with exams, because my father is an encyclopedia. He was teaching at La Sorbonne de Paris when he was 18. So I don't have a single diploma. Why theater, I need to digress to get to my point. I've followed two masterclasses (each during 6 full days) as well as several lessons in theater, with the Stanislavski approach. I learned that a good actor is not someone who is acting good. A good actor is someone who is fundamentally being himself. The work you have to do on yourself to become an actor is like therapy. You have to connect with your inner self, and you will encounter all that you don’t want to see. All that you wish it never exist. Of course none of us are marvelous all the time. The principle is fairly simple, you need to have an objective. To have this objective, you need to connect the setting to something you can relate too. It takes lots of preparation, and not only mentally and emotionally, but also physically. Indeed, the body is the actor’s instrument. The parallel with music is quite impressive but I won’t digress there here. Feldenkrais enters there. The mechanic of the exercise is exclusively focusing on your body. You lay down on your back, eyes closed. You locate the regions of your body in contact with the ground and the ones that aren’t. And you take your time to focus on what is happening to any region of your body, one by one. No need to make them all. (The first exercise is to focus on your breathing. You inspire, and you visualize the travel of the air in your right shoulder, from your shoulder to your elbow, from your elbow to your wrist, from your wrist to the very end of your fingers, and all backwards when you expire. Then you do the same with your left arm, each several times, nice and slow. Next there is the cloak exercise.  Still on the ground,  you move from your back to your left side, and pull up your knees at 45°, kind of foetus position. Your right arm is strained in the same axe of your body, extending from your head. Your arm is at noon, and will slowly go to 1pm, and when it reached stopped there. Breathing with your back, you have to feel your back breathing. Then from 1pm to 2pm until you’ve down all the cloak dial. Then you do the other side. Then you go back on your back, all the session should length at the very least one hour. Still breathing, you should have gained more consciousness of your body and its numerous parts. Still eyes closed, all the procedure is done eyes closed, you don’t have to worry if the exercise is done right or not, is not the point, on the contrary is best to be lost and invent own path. Before getting up you will visualize several time the way you will get up. When you feel ready, you do it, and only when you’re up, you open your eyes. I am telling you, this is hard drugs. If you have to go and play a duo with a girl which is supposed to be your ex-wife for instance, you will connect with someone you know that you could associate with in real life. With this comes the work of sensory imagination. You walk in a piece, not in circle, is very important to break walking pattern, all eyes closed. You think of a word. The word would enter a category such as : rip, cold, hot, sticky, silk, break, melt etc. You have to in repetition try to be this element, and associate a vocal shouting or sound to it. You can also try to smell a specific odor, or touching a specific material such as foam for instance. All this is preparation. Before performing, I always go to the place several hours before, only to impregnate myself with the place. I connect with the place, and I feel the difference between when empty and when full of people, willing to see what you have to offer.)
Acting is not done in the purpose of being good or bad at it, because there is no such criteria. Is an important part of the work to explore places of yourself that you don’t want to explore. So basically if you are acting a man that will go visit a friend, in your preparation you can decide that your objective is to be supportive. Or not. Or something totally different. Then you have the work of actions. Actions are things like, lying, or trying to persuade, or being happy, or being depressed, etc. They will get triggered the moment you connect to your objective by connecting to yourself associating real life elements and implementing them to fictional situation. Recently I worked with a person who needed to interpret Petra von Kant from Fassbinder. At a rehearsal, she went so deep into it that she couldn’t sleep for several nights after. This is because she was truly living it on stage.
I’m not an actor, all this helps me in my life, and in music. I have a true passion for music, yet I don’t practice that often. I don’t spend each minute of my life focusing on my passion, to the point it could be questioned whether it really is a passion or not. Well it is, and it doesn’t matter. I work when I work, and I play HIII when I play HIII.
I am willing to think talent doesn’t mean much. Work pays off. Some very famous and notorious actor from which I forgot the name, needed to have a working preparation of 5 to 6 hours before performing, for the same result as another famous and notorious actor from whom I too forgot the name only needed 2 hours. And when I say pays off, I mean spiritually, not in a religious way, but in the only way which is a or the path you think is true.
The regions of myself I had to explore while doing acting work with Stanilsavski’s approach certainly had an enormous impact on me and has been extremely beneficial to myself, helping a lot with depression and self-hatred that were only leading me toward self-destruction. Not many teachers nor schools use this approach, a good book I could suggest is The Actor and Target by Declan Donellan. When I read this I was shocked how some working material destined to actors could actually relate way further than you could think of.
Hardly enough I started to put things back in place, and it will take time, years, but I know that the more important now is try keeping track the best I can.
I don't know if this is of much help, but sharing some of my life experience seemed the best I could answer, as I also have demons.
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Zeki
Zeki


Supreme Hero
sup
posted December 25, 2014 12:46 AM

Hey, really sad to read something like this, especially now on Christmas n stuff. I don't think i can help you very much as im only 18 myself and very unexperienced in life i guess. But you know, im coming to Bulgaria in around half a year, i know it's nothing much and maybe stupid but we could try and meet up then? I can get you properly wasted, you could maybe help me polish my Bulgarian a little bit ;D I'm not that good in writing about such stuff, but in Person im sure i can do better. So maybe you can survive till then, maybe you'll even feel well till then but i would never the less find that idea kinda interesting.
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artu
artu


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
My BS sensor is tingling again
posted December 25, 2014 01:54 AM

I once heard one of our most famous historians telling that people shouldnt major in history, they should rather major in something more specific like philology or law(!) and then master in history if necessary. He added most important historians are like that. Another one of our most famous writers was a lawyer who looked at his own cases when sued for what he wrote during the Cold War.

You seem to have a balanced, realistic approach in things (even though you are clearly a little depressed at the moment) and a background in law is nothing but helpful when trying to analyze the systems of the past. If you have the will and discipline to graduate from something like the law with good grades even when you dont like it, you are actually in quite a practical spot about what you want to do with your life. Your major is not totally unrelated to your interests, on the contrary. Not to mention it can help you out financially.
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Are you pretty? This is my occasion. - Ghost

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Lexxan
Lexxan


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Unimpressed by your logic
posted December 25, 2014 02:26 AM

Vokial, just do like I did and just enroll in college once more

That being said though, I wish I had realized I really wanted to become a teacher BEFORE I studied linguistics at uni, but oh well.
____________
Coincidence? I think not!!!!

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kayna
kayna


Supreme Hero
posted December 25, 2014 03:14 AM
Edited by kayna at 03:18, 25 Dec 2014.

Hm. That first post is border line suicide. 30's breakdown? Anyways. If your depression is that far, I suggest you let the beast inside of you out and have fun in any way that can quell it. Aka doing whatever you want and telling anyone placing any restriction on you to bugger off. Even if that leads to getting high once in a while or whatever. Not the best of options though, but better than being confined all your life, physically and mentally.

Having few friends : Most people have few friends. Having plenty of friends is a young thing that pass very quickly for most people. We all grow apart from each other, many reveal their true colors in time and stab you, things like that. The true friends? Most can count them on one hand. The rest are people you just know. You are far from alone in that regard.

Your parent pressure : I know the feeling. I was brainwashed to become a schizophrenic lawyer between 9 and 17 years old. It's like your parent pressure except I was never told what I was supposed to become. Not to mention training me to hate things and nurturing a mental illness in a specific way. Parents pressuring their kids to become lawyers is more common than you think, you're not the first one I hear with a story like yours ( or mine ). And in all examples I've heard so far, I find that those parents doesn't even understand jack snow about our governments and what's truly going on! Not to mention that I was ( and still am today ) gang stalked as well after all that ordeal. Your parents might have been jack asses but unless you're holding out, they weren't -that- bad. I think you need to learn to speak for yourself and tell people pushing you around to get the f---- out. Why don't you start by them? Go scream names at them and tell them it's their fault and all the snow they did to you. I'm not sure if it's a good idea to keep family ties but I can assure you you will feel lighter and stronger if you do.

The law : Given that the two options is to either pratice the law itself or work in the public domain, from how you describe yourself, it seems the latter is simply not for you. Plenty of people do a job they don't particularly enjoy, perhaps you should focus on working less time but with a higher pay grade. Have you ever considered taking a specialty? If you think about it, maybe you'll find an interesting specialty to pratice your law and make it interesting for you.

Anyways. Parents not being proud of their kids when they want to become a teacher ( a very important part of society, mind you. ) is just wrong.

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Ghost
Ghost


Undefeatable Hero
Therefore I am
posted December 25, 2014 03:27 AM

Good Kayna! Yea parents kept "better", not granted his parents etc
But you can go to Cuba
Maybe someone had been strong, rich etc But persona never changed
You can't know if you saved too much - your only life - also in long period

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Tsar-Ivor
Tsar-Ivor


Promising
Legendary Hero
Scourge of God
posted December 25, 2014 04:17 AM
Edited by Tsar-Ivor at 04:22, 25 Dec 2014.

Lexxan said:
Vokial, just do like I did and just enroll in college once more



I got the impression that the probleim is not necessarily that he studied the wrong thing, it is more to do with the fact that he doesn't know what he wants to do. Pretty common here, people going to uni not because it is a necessary step toward their dream, but because it is the next "safe" life choice after leaving school/college.

Quote:
is the difficulty that what you want to do seems impossible?


The only thing that's impossible is a desire that is in breach of the laws of nature, everything else is wholly dependant on the amount of determination that one has.
____________
"No laughs were had. There is only shame and sadness." Jenny

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friendofgunnar
friendofgunnar


Honorable
Legendary Hero
able to speed up time
posted December 25, 2014 04:19 AM

One thing you shouldn't do is think of your time in college as a waste.  You are now part of "the club", which is to say that you've proved your worth as a hard-working person able to conform to society's expectations.  There's a wide diversity of jobs available now that prolly have very little to do with law.  

For example let's say that you go to a newspaper or other news place and say that you'd like to do some writing for them on historical or archeological topics.  Because you've been to college for 6 years and got good marks you're ideas will likely be considered seriously.

Everybody in my family (except me) is part of The Club and they all live in an entirely different strata.

So!

Soak in some sunshine, have a good meal, and start looking for opportunities in something besides law.

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blizzardboy
blizzardboy


Honorable
Undefeatable Hero
Nerf Herder
posted December 25, 2014 04:56 AM
Edited by blizzardboy at 06:30, 25 Dec 2014.

One of the worst things imaginable you could do is base your life decisions on how you feel. Too many people overvalue the importance of feelings.

Picture yourself as an old galleon ship. If you're a ship, then your feelings would be your sails; they accelerate you forward. What happens if you start treating your sails as if they were your wheel? You just blow wherever the wind does. You have no direction, and you're more likely to spin around in circles or land in Antarctica than you are to reach Tahiti. How do you get to Tahiti if you just go with your sails? It's such a small island of paradise on such a vast ocean of possibilities. To have realistic expectations of reaching such a destination, you need precise, practical, and correct coordinates, otherwise you'll miss it.

Your feelings will adapt on their own. Too many people swallow the baseless myth that you're born, and what you like is X, and what you dislike is Y, and it stays that way. It doesn't. Human tastes and attitudes and to a certain extent, even personalities themselves, are a soft clay. If you don't like something, then make yourself like it. Expand yourself. How do you do this? By using a skill that all of us learn at around the age of 3. You pretend. You think to yourself, "What would I do if I liked something?", and then you do it, regardless of what your interior feelings might be, and you continue to do it, and overtime, your psyche will adjust, and you will start to like it for real. When you follow a fiction long enough, it eventually becomes a reality. Stop using your sails as your compass. What sane captain would ever do that? None of them would. Instead of thinking about what you intuitively like, focus instead on what you think would develop your character, your intellect, your hobbies, your perspective, and basically your overall improvement & enrichment as a thinking, feeling, learning human being. The "good feelings" will come, if you allow them, and if you're not constantly mentally reinforcing the idea that you hate something. If you start having negative thoughts, squash them, and tell yourself you're going to like something. Much of human likes and dislikes are already determined based on your apprehensions before you even do it.

I'm a school teacher at a private school. I think my job is awesome. I did not feel this way when I first started. I had to force myself to change, by undergoing long-term pretending, and now, I greatly enjoy my job. There are countless millions of people all over the world that hate their jobs. In large part, it is because they refuse to play pretend as grown-ups. Instead, they focus solely on external variables to improve their situation while neglecting the far more accessible interior variables. When you simply use your intuitions in order to find what job, romantic interest, friends, living situation, etc. that you want, your list ends up becoming pathetically small, and you likewise exist in a small & pathetic universe. You become the kind of guy that likes three things on the menu of a 4-star restaurant. When you stop mentally reinforcing the idea that the next person on the phone is going to give you a headache, your situation will immediately begin to gradually improve. You start to implement more humor, graciousness, and confidence in everything you do. You eventually reach a point where you actually feed off of the rush of difficult & challenging situations. The stuff that once upon a time caused you stress, instead causes exhilaration.

Basically, ignore all of that stuff you might have heard about, "Just be yourself! ". No. You're being "yourself" right now, and is that working out for you? Certainly doesn't look like it. "The proof of the pudding is in the eating of it" and all that. I'd say it isn't working. "Be yourself! " is nothing but a euphemistic way of saying, "Make decisions with your intestinal tract! " Instead of being yourself, be who you want to be.
____________
"Folks, I don't trust children. They're here to replace us."

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kayna
kayna


Supreme Hero
posted December 25, 2014 06:14 AM

blizzardboy said:
Too many people overvalue the importance of feelings.


My god I couldn't disagree more with that quote. I agree that people are like clay and can mold themselves into something, especially younger people ( and if he did spend his whole life so far without drinking and did 6 years of university back to back, he certainly proven himself that he could ), but to say what I quoted of you is wrong. One needs to deal with bad feelings when they come up, rather than let then degenerate or build up inside of you. They can even be forgotten and influence you on an unconscious level.

No need to base a life decision based on a feeling, as you say, but rather deal with that negative feeling before taking a life changing decision.

If I understand correctly, he's telling us he's a deep guy born in a family with shallow values ( where his whole family disagrees with him becoming a teacher instead of just his two parents ) and he is looking for more meaning in his life ( which is pretty much his work ). He sacrified his social life to uphold the monetary ideal of his parents ( rather than his own ) and now he feels truly alone and worthless even though he isn't worthless and we're all, to a certain degree, alone. Molding someone into another shape is a possibly dangerous process ; if it is more than he can handle, he will break. And that is the real danger. That is not to be underestimated.

I believe what he needs is a way to let out his anger and also realize that some of his problems are totally normal.

Anyways.

If you plan of becoming a lawyer bro, well, I dont know if being a lawyer where you are is like where I am, but where I live, there's two types of laywers ; those that do their work like the cops wants them to do it and those that doesn't. Those that submits get the cops help every time they need it, those that dont ( because they want a lot or money or because they follow their own sense of justice, which can be even more just than the local law, they re quite corrupted after all ) have a really hard time. Every thing takes twice the amount of time and you also better know how to defend yourself. If you plan the latter path bro, go take some karate classes. Or go work physically when you can.

Honestly, I know a few guys with 3 years of law, and they all made one big money job then invested in houses and appartments that they renovated. None of them are actual lawyers cuz it can be a really snowty job.


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Zenofex
Zenofex


Responsible
Legendary Hero
Kreegan-atheist
posted December 25, 2014 08:35 AM

I graduated as an International Relations master, my interests are almost entirely in the field of the humanities (history, philosophy, economy) and I work on a senior technical position in the IT field. Some 6 years ago I actually didn't know that I would like IT work, let alone technical stuff - at that time re-installing the Windows on my PC was the most technical thing I could do - but here I am now, with a fairly decent job which I like and which has turned into a profession over time. I haven't stopped reading about what interests me either, the job is no obstacle to one's personal interests which might be totally unrelated (provided that the salary is good enough to allow you to have other interests though, that's a fact). If there's something I really don't like about it, it would be that the bloody engineers all around me are damn clueless about everything that doesn't work with a binary code and wasn't invented in the last 30-40 years - hard to have a decent philosophical discussion with such people.  

The point is - you probably don't even know what you would find enjoyable. The university degree doesn't mean much, it just highlights that you have spent 4-7 years studying something for some reason and if that something isn't medicine or pharmacy (where your diploma would really matter), it's no big deal. If you are good at something or simply don't mind doing it, check if there are any job offers about it. If someone offers to pay you about something you like doing - even if the salary isn't spectacular - all the better. But by all means, don't start working something you know you would hate if you don't need money very badly, that would turn into a persistent problem for you. I know such people, none of them is happy.

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artu
artu


Promising
Undefeatable Hero
My BS sensor is tingling again
posted December 25, 2014 11:05 AM

I think what Blizz suggests may work about the details but not the core. If you hate being a teacher and you cant stand to be around children, there's no way you are going to be a spectecular teacher just by pretending. You can learn not to whine and let the make ends meet but that's it, that's how far pretending will get you. If you like being a teacher overall but cant stand to read exam papers though, you can adjust just like he said. Otherwise, you'll crack or go neurotic like Kanya says, pushing everything in is never healthy.

Once again, a degree in law is nothing but helpful when you are interested in humanities, I think VG cant see it because his life is" finally" starting, kind of makes him scared a little which is a very regular and normal feeling.
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