|
| Thread: Do men really want to have children? |  This thread is pages long: 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 · «PREV / NEXT» |
|
Storm-Giant
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
On the Other Side!
|
posted May 20, 2014 12:29 AM |
|
|
Jabanoss said:
I particularly found Joonas thought's about rather being mother than being a father to be very intriguing.
Well, he wonders if Elvin was a female. Maybe he wishes Elvin was his mother?
____________
|
|
RedEmperor30
Famous Hero
|
|
posted May 20, 2014 01:00 PM |
|
|
...for what it's worth,
I am a father of 2 children, 6 yrs and 3 yrs old. You're question is quite a broad one but here are my thoughts:-
1. remove our ego as humans and character traits/ flaws and you are left with a basic principle, encoded in all living things on this planet, is procreation of species to survive [I'm not going to debate how are we as a species is completely #$%^#$^ the world - this can be another thread all together]. If this coding has not settled in you, so be it - there's no judgement on this what so ever, people are actually allowed to think for themselves.
2. being pressured by anyone male or female to have a child is just plain bull****. there is a fundamental mismatch in the relationship if 1 side wants kids, and the other does not, move on life is too short for stress and krap!
3. you will never know unconditional love ever, if you do not have a child, created between 2 people who love eachother [so cliched - whatever!!]. Currently all the love you have experienced is conditional, you love your parents because they love you or care for you, likewise your friends, likewise you pets etc etc hell i love my wife because she loves me. I know this may seem to you in current perspective "unconditional" but unfortunately it just isn't. As a father, whatever my children will do today/ tomorrow, I will always love them and be there for them, even if they turn out hating me, i want for nothing on my side, but the happiness and safety for my children.
faced with a terrifying question, if a car was going to hit my wife or my child and i could only save one of them, my choice everytime would be my child - instinctively!
|
|
Stevie
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted May 20, 2014 01:01 PM |
|
Edited by Stevie at 21:52, 27 May 2014.
|
Holy snow Red. You did it!
You found out the rest of the forums! 
Now you know what a meroe is? 
|
|
RedEmperor30
Famous Hero
|
|
posted May 20, 2014 01:03 PM |
|
|
Stevie said:
Holy shiet Red. You did it!
You found out the rest of the forums!
Now you know what a meroe is?
walk down the hill young bull, walk 
|
|
meroe
Supreme Hero
Basically Smurfette
|
|
posted May 20, 2014 04:04 PM |
|
|
Thank you RedEmperor that was really lovely.
However, and I am honestly not nit picking here. It was what you said about unconditional love only coming from having children.
You said that you will love your children no matter what. And I believe you. Even if they end up hating you. And I am sure most parents would nod their heads sagely and completely and honestly agree to that.
Yet you also said 'Currently all the love you have experienced is conditional, you love your parents because they love you or care for you'.
Well isn't that also unconditional love being experienced from your parents? I mean in normal happy families ???
I know for a fact that my 'father' would save my 'mom'. No questions asked. Probably push me in front of the car to slow it down first.
____________
Meroe is definetely out, sweet
as she sounds sometimes, she'd
definetely castrate you with a
rusted razror and forcefeed
your genitals to you in a
blink of an eye - Kipshasz
|
|
RedEmperor30
Famous Hero
|
|
posted May 20, 2014 04:07 PM |
|
|
meroe said:
Thank you RedEmperor that was really lovely.
However, and I am honestly not nit picking here. It was what you said about unconditional love only coming from having children.
You said that you will love your children no matter what. And I believe you. Even if they end up hating you. And I am sure most parents would nod their heads sagely and completely and honestly agree to that.
Yet you also said 'Currently all the love you have experienced is conditional, you love your parents because they love you or care for you'.
Well isn't that also unconditional love being experienced from your parents? I mean in normal happy families ???
I know for a fact that my 'father' would save my 'mom'. No questions asked. Probably push me in front of the car to slow it down first.
lol
well you see it is a never ending cycle, your parents love you unconditionally believe it or not, you however love your parents with condition, when you were born they took care of you, they loved you and continue to do so, you have the choice not to love them - as parents i don't believe we have a choice to stop loving our children.
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 09:40 AM |
|
|
First I would like to start by wishing the best to their kids to all fathers here 
Secondly, I would like to say that me and my wife never really wanted children, but as it happens in life a small "accident" occured some time ago and now in 3 months I am going to be a father ( it's a girl as far as I'm told).
What I wanted to say is that although at first I wasn't very keen on the idea of me being a parent, I started to look at things different lately, after work at home I ask about if the baby moved, and I find myself talking to my wife's belly sometimes; I know it sounds strange, but this is one of the things that changes your perspective on a lot of stuff. Bottom line is that I'm glad I'm going to be a parent, although for the last 31 years I never gave it much thought and I'm pretty sure that all ( most of u) will feel the same when the time comes.
____________
|
|
Stevie
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 09:42 AM |
|
Edited by Stevie at 09:43, 21 May 2014.
|
Aaaawww, watcher, that's so sweet. 
Also you have been told it was an accident.
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 09:46 AM |
|
|
Stevie said:
Also you have been told it was an accident.
You obviously do not know my wife, she is the peak of workaholism and a career junkie by nature.
____________
|
|
Stevie
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 09:52 AM |
|
|
Oh watchy, watchy, watchy... When will you ever learn. Don't you know that is PRECISELY the reason? She wants a kid because that's the work of her hands. It's an accomplishment! She wanted a kid, just go in a quiet room, sit on the bed, look her in the eyes and hold her hands, then ask her. She'll tell you.. the truth! 
Grats for having a baby! 
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 09:58 AM |
|
|
Dude, whatever makes u happy, I have no need to impose my opinion over yours, although I would bet that in regards to life experience I might have the upper edge.
____________
|
|
RedEmperor30
Famous Hero
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 10:06 AM |
|
|
|
@watcher gratz man - this will be a world changing experience for you!!!
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 10:20 AM |
|
|
RedEmperor30 said:
@watcher gratz man - this will be a world changing experience for you!!!
Thx man.
____________
|
|
Stevie
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 10:57 AM |
|
|
watcher83 said:
Dude, whatever makes u happy, I have no need to impose my opinion over yours, although I would bet that in regards to life experience I might have the upper edge.
I was just messing with ya a bit. I don't doubt your vast experience obi wan. Plis teach me someday
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 11:17 AM |
|
|
Believe in the force and IT will show you the way, my young padawan
____________
|
|
meroe
Supreme Hero
Basically Smurfette
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 03:28 PM |
|
|
Congratulations Watcher. You will soon have your very own little Princess and join the ranks of Cor and Angelito.
____________
Meroe is definetely out, sweet
as she sounds sometimes, she'd
definetely castrate you with a
rusted razror and forcefeed
your genitals to you in a
blink of an eye - Kipshasz
|
|
watcher83
Supreme Hero
Child of Malassa
|
|
posted May 21, 2014 05:26 PM |
|
|
Thx Meroe and to all other who might cogratulate me in the future so I won't have to make a ty post again
____________
|
|
Stevie
Responsible
Undefeatable Hero
|
|
posted May 27, 2014 06:04 PM |
|
|
OMG. I can't believe I actually had this kind of a conversation with you watcher. I totally forgot.
Now my first reaction rereading this after meeting you: /facedesk.
|
|
steyn
Supreme Hero
|
|
posted May 28, 2014 04:19 PM |
|
|
meroe said:
You see I know this will sound daft to a lot of you, but as men don't actually go through pregnancy, hormone swings, haemorrhoids, morning sickness, stretch marks and then labor - horrible pain, splitting, episiotomies, stitches etc. Do they turn a blind eye to that in their drive to 'play God'?
This is one of the reasons I don't want children. I don't want my girlfriend to go through this stuff.
Also I don't think I am capable of raising a kid. In my opinion there should be some kind of parenting school where you have to go before you are allowed to have kids. To me it seems to often people treat taking kids like taking a dog
Luckely my girlfriend thinks the same about having kids If she ever changes her mind I am willing to reconsider, but I absolutely don't mind not having kids. Of course this might change when I get older
|
|
meroe
Supreme Hero
Basically Smurfette
|
|
posted May 28, 2014 05:08 PM |
|
|
Thanks Steyn - your comments also helped along the lines of 'attitudes changing as we get older'. Maybe guys do get a bit broody
____________
Meroe is definetely out, sweet
as she sounds sometimes, she'd
definetely castrate you with a
rusted razror and forcefeed
your genitals to you in a
blink of an eye - Kipshasz
|
|
|
|
